These Games We Play
by ChrsitineDae17
Summary: The joker kidnaps Rachel Dawes one night. But what starts out as a night of horror turns into a night of intimacy for both of them, and hidden feelings secrets are revealed. WARNING: Abuse and talk of rape. Story has been updated for viewer's pleasure
1. AUTHOR'S NOTE: IMPORTANT

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Hello everyone! Yes it is me, I am back from the grave of writer's block. I am incredibly sorry for not updating in so long. In my defense, it was because of horrible writer's block, and because I honestly thought everyone just became uninterested after a while. But thanks to my most recent reviewer, I have been convinced to write another chapter. **

**Now, I don't know if this will be a last chapter or not…I'll have to see if I get anymore brilliant ideas afterwards.**

**I do want to let everyone know though, that I have updated all of my previous chapters. After re-reading some of them, I realized that though some of them are sweet, they just don't seem very realistic of the joker. So, following the advice of some previous reviewers, I have updated everything. I hope you all like it! And please, if anyone feels the need to give me more advice/ suggestions to help me finish my story, I am all ears.**

**I promise the next chapter will be updated soon. After reviewing all my previous chapters, wheels in my brain began turning again. Be patient, and pleeeeease stick around. Thanks guys!**

**Sincerely,**

**Christine Daae**


	2. Kidnapped!

**Hey all! I'm back again! Okay, so it's been a loooong time since I've updated this story. Well, I came across it again when I was just looking at my profile, and decided to read it again**_**.**_** I noticed some mistakes in grammar and other things as well, so I've updated the whole thing.**

**To those of you who have been devoted to my writing and waiting on me, please forgive me, I had maaaaaaajor writer's block. But I'm back now, and will make it up to you all. Please feel free to make any suggestions that would help this story progress. Reviews and advice are welcome! Flames…not so much. **

**I'll leave how the ending should be up to ya'll. Please feel free to suggest how you would like the story to end. Read and review. PLEEEEASE!**

**Disclaimer: **I do not own the joker or Rachel Dawes in this story (sadly).

**Chapter 1: Kidnapped**

12:35a.m. and buried under hills of paperwork; just how I intended on spending my evening. Stuck at the station of Gotham's finest I plaster another resentful smile, pushing along orders of various natures while fighting the struggle to keep my sanity in tact.

Everything these days had been shot into a whirlpool of madness giving me the chance to breathe but not sleep, and so the fight continues to build a better Gotham. Between The Joker's never ending reign of terror (or so it seemed), Harvey's fascination with batman and his conquest for the greater good, and Bruce whom I would love nothing more than to see on a one way trip out of my life forever, I could not think straight.

It had only been a week since the joker found his way into our lives and it seemed all too farfetched to believe, that is until a beaten, bat clothed corpse with that same sadistic smile spread on it's mug beats you in the face on your way to shutting down an entire mob organization. I looked at the clock, 12:42…I let out a sigh, and dropped the pen in my hand.

I had met my limit, finding a safe stopping point with a satisfied grin on my face as I reached for the brief case that looked as if it too were ready to be reunited with my hand after these long stressful hours.

I hurried down the corridor of the first floor waving a simple goodbye to the men still patrolling the graveyard shift, and of course the guard at the very front door. It was all a blur at this point, and quite frankly, I just did not care anymore. Sleep, sleep, and more sleep were the only things on the brain.

Silent, and still were the empty streets, only filled with life for the briefest moment by the flickering of car lights as I proceeded to unlock the doors.

Wasting not time at all, the briefcase met my back seat, and all gave a serene impression, as my workday had met an end…. or so I thought.

"_Hello Beautiful"_. I could say nothing; my body stood there frozen, lifeless to my surroundings, as the smooth velvet enclosed hand dipped around my waist, and…. Black.


	3. His Captive

**Chapter 2: His Captive**

I awoke in a shock. My head was empty…lightheaded, an unpleasant euphoria swept over me completely while my body made a futile attempt to sit up. My eyes darted up to my once freelance hands that were now confined to what seemed to be faded brass bedposts due to handcuffs.

Once at the realization there was no way I was leaving, my vision then carried about the room, but had been restricted by the given light source of my settings. 'Don't panic, Do. Not. Panic.' I couldn't help but notice my rapid breathing, doing what I could to slow it down, while keeping happy thoughts abound in my head so as not to let out s blood curdling scream, getting me killed for sure...as if the duct tape would allow such a thing.

It was in that moment that I heard them…footsteps, _his_ footsteps. Closer, and closer as my mind raced over the events of the earlier days of the week the steps made a crescendo with every shallow breath I could muster.

"Well, well, look who we have here,"his stern expression could have brought any man to his knees, or at least a swift kick in the ego would have been exerted, but all I could do was stare.

His alabaster painted face, with deep black circles around the eyes; all of which came to hold a glow as he bent down to my restrained form, flashing me that malevolent smile dripping with a hue of brilliant, crimson red. He reached out ever so carefully to stroke my cheek, keeping the touch subtle as if he were too afraid to leave a mark.

I was shaking under his touch.

"Now, now, now, now, now don't be nervous," he took out what seemed to be a switchblade pocket knife, hovering it over my blouse; his free hand ravenous to my curves stopping to stroke lightly between my thighs. "I'm going to take very good care of you."

My eyes widened in realization when looking into my captor's lustful eyes.

He wanted me.

I tried to scream, but the duct tape prevented any kind of sound that wanted to escape my lips. Instinctively, I began to struggle so violently that the joker actually fell back in surprise.

However, it didn't take long for his eyes to narrow in disapproval at my reaction towards him.

Those eyes intimidated me, and I closed my own in fear of looking at him any longer. Almost immediately, I felt two strong hands grab my struggling frame and firmly hold me down to the bed.

My eyes snapped open to see him on top of me, glaring at me with those haunted eyes. I writhed beneath him continuously, desperate to escape. "Ah ta ta ta, let's not get carried away now little Rachel." He scolded me quietly, almost as if I were a child.

Yet strangely enough, his menacing voice, still had a hint of a soothing sound mixed in there somewhere. Freaked out as I was, I couldn't help but naturally feel a little, just a _little_ calmed by his voice, and I steadily relaxed under his gaze. 

"There now, was that so hard?"He giggled while reaching for a strand of my hair, playing with it between his fingers.

I wished so badly that I could slap his pallid hand away, but there was little I could do with my hands cuffed to the bed. "You're going to be part of a little game of mine tonight beautiful. You see, I can't seem to get your beautiful face out of my head, and I just won't be able to sleep again until I satisfy my own needs."

Whatever fear had lingered within me, suddenly fled! I suddenly felt unspeakable rage fill my soul. I began to shout (or attempt to anyway) every foul word I could think of towards this freak.

He cocked his head in amusement at my fabled attempt to speak. He leaned his head close to me and said mockingly, "What? I'm sorry I can't really understand you precious, could you speak up?" My voice rose to an almost painful decibel, but my words were still muffled by the damned tape on my mouth.

"Miss Dawes, you really shouldn't mumble because I have no idea what you're trying to say. Seriously, you're…you're not coming through to me. How did you manage to make it out of kindergarten Miss Dawes?" I let out a yell in frustration, and the joker smirked as I began to struggle again with him on top of me.

He giggled in delight at my actions. "My my Miss Dawes, we're a little desperate to begin aren't we? Don't worry, your wish will come true very soon."

I then remembered that my legs were free, and bucked the joker off of me before administering a powerful kick to his groin. I was victorious! I watched in grim satisfaction as he fell to the floor with a groan. The feeling at having brought the joker to his knees was such a delight, that I began to laugh insanely beneath my sealed mouth.

The joker growled at being laughed at, and stood up abruptly. I knew he was still trying to regain his breath after being hit where the sun don't shine, so I took the opportunity to insult him with my facial expressions. I knew I was asking for it, but I just couldn't help myself.

To my surprise, the joker began to laugh obnoxiously at me. I stopped making faces, and watched him incredulously as he made his way back over to me. "Really now Miss Dawes, that was the most childish thing I've seen any of my victims do before. I wish you could've seen the looks you were giving me."

He continued to laugh.

My blood boiled at his words. I uttered out one word that could actually be understood, even beneath my bound mouth…"_freak!" _Instantly, the laughing stopped and the joker was in my face.

My eyes widened in fear at his severe expression.

But then for just a second, my fear was forgotten by his eyes…why did they look so familiar?

Before I could figure it out, I was suddenly rewarded with a powerful slap to the cheek. Tears instantly sprang into my eyes, and I couldn't suppress the little whimper that escaped my lips.

Obviously, that one word I'd called him hit home.

The joker's stern gaze never left my tear-filled eyes, and I closed mine again, embarrassed that he was actually seeing me tear up.

The mortification I felt actually helped my emotions become more unstable, and out of nowhere, the tears began to run down my face like rain drops.

_Crap…I think my time of month is about to start…_

I concluded when trying to figure out the reason for my easy tears.

See, I hardly ever cried around anyone; Harvey hadn't even seen me cry yet. Bruce, my lifelong friend, was probably the only one who had ever seen me break down like I was now.

I felt the joker's hands gently caress and hold my face, rubbing the red spot where he had so vigorously hit me. For a minute, I was convinced that the joker was almost sorry for hurting my, oh so _beautiful_ face.

I squinted my eyes even tighter as I felt him turn my face towards him.

"Hey…look at me…"He commanded quietly but severely; I wouldn't obey. His hands grasped my face more firmly. "Look. At. Me. Rachel."

This time it was a dangerous, almost seductive growl.

Wait…where the hell did that come from? How was that seductive?

The way he said my name made my heart jump, but I was too scared to follow his command._**"LOOK AT ME!" **_He roared angrily, nearly giving me a heart attack. My eyes snapped open in an instant. His eyes were boring into mine, and I couldn't help but let mine linger on his gaze.

"Do you like how this feels, Miss Dawes? Being trapped, helpless like a baby in this situation?"I froze when hearing this seemingly rhetorical question. Why exactly was he asking me this? I thought it was pretty obvious I was uncomfortable.

"You can't escape, you can barely fight, and you can't even get a word in edgewise to express your feelings."His eyes didn't look angry anymore, they looked bitter…almost tormented...even as he smiled insanely at me.

I waited to hear what else he would say.

"This is exactly how I felt, Rachel Dawes, whenever my father was near me. Whenever he came home drunk and would beat my mother in front of my eyes. Whenever he would blame me for his faults, and use his belt on me because he couldn't bear to think that he was messed up. I couldn't save my mom because I wasn't strong enough! I couldn't even defend myself, because I would have no energy left in me after he'd beat the living daylights outta me! He was always stronger than me, and I was powerless against him!"

My throat choked up a little at the sound of his voice. Even though he smiled and occasionally laughed as he ranted, there was still a trace of bitterness in his voice.

At that moment, the maternal instinct in me wished I could offer him some kind of comfort…

"But I always knew that I would get my revenge Miss Dawes." He continued to say. "Oh yes, he had every reason to be afraid of me. When he killed my mother, and gave me these hideous scars," he pointed to his face, "he had signed his death warrant right there."

My eyes widened in horror upon hearing this. So, that story he had told me about his wife at Bruce's party was a lie. Somehow, this story was more believable.

My face scrunched up in sorrow for the joker's lost childhood. Why did it have to happen to him? Why did it have to happen to anyone? Tears began to fall down my face again as he looked at me.

His eyes widened in brief shock at my reaction. "Miss Dawes, are you crying for me?" He asked while moving to tenderly wipe my tears away.

I closed my eyes against his touch, and tried to return the caress by nudging his hand with my cheek, letting him know it was okay.

I felt the joker's hand stiffen and pull away at my compassionate response.

When I opened my eyes, he was standing away from the bed; his back facing me. "We live in a cruel world Rachel. Don't pity me with your tears."He said bitterly before turning to face me again.

"Want to know how my lovely little story ends, Miss Dawes?"He asked, his lips slowly curving into an evil smile. "I won…" He breathed. "I killed my father on his fortieth birthday. I was only eighteen, and it was my first murder." 

My eyes widened...he sounded almost like he was proud of this.

"Oh yes Miss Dawes…in the end, he was defenseless against me, his own son. It was fun too, watching his face as I took the same knife he used to carve my face with, be the very weapon that ended his worthless life."

The joker began to laugh excitedly at this gruesome memory he was reiterating to me.

"'_Why so serious?' _I had said, and then returned the favor he gave me as a child, before completely ending his life."His eerie laugh filled the air when he finished his story, and it didn't seem like it would stop anytime soon.

So much hate, so made anger, so much revenge, so much bitterness, so much sorrow…to feel no love like that, and then make it worse by seeking revenge…it was all too much for one person to bear.

Eventually, the joker's laughter died down. "Ah well, enough about me, let's get back to you."He exclaimed excitedly while bounding back over to my side giddily.

Upon seeing my tears again, the joker knelt next to me. "Aw, shh shh shh shh."

He soothed mockingly while stroking my cheek with his cold hand. "There there, enough tears little Rachel, I promise I will make it all go away."

My heart jumped as the joker proceeded to take up his knife, and climb on top of me AGAIN.

I whimpered and shook my head wildly at his gesture. _Please don't do this…please…_ I begged silently. The joker smirked and wagged his finger at me. "Now now little Rachel, can't you just behave like a good little girl for me? If you're good, I promise I'll be gentle."

My cheeks flushed in humiliation at his words. What, was I five or something? I hated being talked to like a little kid! However, deep down, I secretly felt...turned on.

It sounds awful, I know, but I couldn't help but feel my heart race in the littlest bit of excitement about what was about to happen.

Dear Lord…something was seriously wrong with me!

I closed my eyes tightly, and braced myself for the worst as I felt his knife cut open my blouse…


	4. The Wrong Thing to Say

**Chapter 3: The Wrong Thing to Say **

I heard the joker sigh in satisfaction as the sight of my white lacy bra came into view. This was just incredibly awkward.

The joker giggled as he took in the sight of my almost exposed breasts before him. "Wow, looks like someone up there really blessed you with a gift."My cheeks reddened and I tried to yell at him again, but I sighed in defeat when I remembered that I couldn't really speak.

However, the joker reached up and swiftly ripped the tape off of my mouth.

"_OOWCH!" _I howled in pain at this unexpected action. The joker merely laughed at my slight pain. "Sorry, I got tired of talking to myself, and I'm so curious to know what you're trying to say."

Grateful to have my mouth back, I turned a scrutinizing glare at him and proceeded to speak my mind. "Well it's about time you son of a bitch!"I all but yelled at him, suddenly furious that he dared to shut me up with duct tape.

The joker's eyes widened and he giggled insanely at my words. "Rachel Dawes I'm surprised at you!"He scolded in a mock stern tone while wagging his finger at me. "You shouldn't say such naughty words young lady, it doesn't make me very happy or your situation any better."

I rolled my eyes, tired that he playing the paternal role at this moment. "You're crazy!" I snarled.

The joker shook his head in denial. "I'm not. No. I'm. Not…" He growled slowly into my ear. Note to self, never call the joker a freak or crazy.

"If you keep this up little Rachel, I just may have to punish you."

DID HE REALLY JUST SAY THAT? 

"OH! YOU DID YOU NOT JUST SAY THAT!" I screamed at him, my cheeks now a deep crimson. "Do me a favor and stop talking to me like I'm five joker! I'm not a child! I'm a woman, if you haven't noticed!"

The joker found this amusing and only laughed louder. "Oh beautiful, you're more like a child stuck in a woman's body. Plus, it's so much more fun this way!" He replied insultingly while continuing to laugh.

I shook my head incredulously, and something inside of me snapped. "You should talk you bastard! You're calling me the child? Who's the one that never had a childhood? Who's the one that had a weak mother and a father who never loved him? At least I actually grew up, you screwed up, psycho, manic depressive murdering asshole!"

I instantly regretted my words. As much as I pitied and hated the joker right now, no one, not even him deserved what I just said. The joker's eyes darkened dangerously, and his lips curled into a furious snarl. In that next moment, his head snapped back and he let out a heart-wrenching howl that came from the very depths of his soul.

My body froze, and I swear I felt myself turning white at the sound of that unearthly scream.

Before I could think, the joker roughly took my face in his cold hand and forced me to look at him. "That's one step too far Rachel Dawes!" He growled heatedly and he then began to undo my cuffs.

I turned pale with fear, as I realized that I had gotten in far too deep with his bad side to get out of it now. As he was un-cuffing me, he proceeded to growl to me words that I wish I never had to hear.

"Perhaps you should get a true taste of what I had to go through as a child with my father, Miss Dawes! Then you will think twice next time before insulting me like that ever again!"

I trembled with dread. What had I done? What was he going to do to me?


	5. Consequences

**Chapter 4: Consequences **

When the joker had gotten my last handcuff off, I decided to try and make a run for it. Foolish mistake…as soon as I had bolted up from the bed, I ran for the door. I tried to open it, but it was locked much to my dismay. I suddenly felt my feet pulled out from beneath me.

"Oh no you don't little Rachel! Come here!" A deadly voice growled.

I screamed as I was dragged back to the bed. The joker pulled me onto the bed, and gathered me up into his strong arms. The feeling of being held in his arms almost eclipsed the immense terror that was coursing throughout my body.

I was too weak to try and escape now.

"Look at me…"I heard the deadly calm voice say to me. Not wanting to make him any angrier than he already was, I willed myself to look at the joker.

He looked upon me with an expression of pure rage and resentment, his heavy breathing matching the quick tempo of my heartbeat.

"Please…" I begged in a whisper. "P-Please d-don't hurt me."

"I warned you…didn't I?"The joker growled quietly, sending shivers up my spine.

"I-I'm sorry…"I stammered, my eyes wide with anxiety. The joker shook his head while scoffing heartlessly.

"Are you begging me Rachel Dawes? My father never listened to my begs or my pleas when he came at me! HE WAS NEVER MERCIFUL!"

Before I could even blink, I was suddenly flipped over on my belly upon the bed. The joker quickly re-cuffed both of my hands to the brass headboard before I could even attempt a struggle.

I then felt the joker tie my feet to the bedpost with rope. When he was finished, he walked back the front of the bed where I could see him. The joker knelt right in front of my terror-stricken face, and gently stroked my cheeks that were wet with newly shed tears.

"_Why so serious?" _He growled wrathfully.

Then, his face broke out into a frightening smile as he held up a dark object in his hand.

My heart nearly stopped when I saw a black belt swing in front of my face…


	6. A Different Reaction

**Chapter 5: A Different Reaction**

The joker smirked at the expression on my face. "I know what you're thinking little Rachel, and yes it's what it looks like. I warned you to behave didn't I? But you wouldn't listen to me."

The joker sighed while getting up and walking towards the middle of the bed. "Well, you'll soon learn to listen to me little Rachel. You'll learn your lesson yet." I shuddered when I felt the leather of the black belt dragged slowly across my back, over my behind, and down my legs.

Surely, he wasn't going to…whip me?

I whimpered again, afraid for dear life. I knew what was coming, but I couldn't bring myself to accept it. "Please don't…"I begged in a choked up voice.

The joker merely laughed away my plea. "Save your breath Miss Dawes. You're going to need it."

A scream ripped through my throat as I felt the belt suddenly slam against my back.

_**15 minutes later…**_

I lay limply in the joker's arms. He was staring at nothing, his face expressionless, and I was trying to breathe. My whole back, bottom, and legs hurt terribly, and all I could do was stay still and try to forget the pain I was in.

I had just spent the last fifteen minutes getting the beating of my life from the joker himself. He worked first on my back, which was awful because I almost lost my breath. It was pure torture; when I started to lose my breath, the joker would stop for a minute, give me time to catch my breath, and then start up again.

Each time he stopped, I would think he was finished, but then I would realize the horrible truth…he wasn't going to stop anytime soon.

When he reached my behind, I remembered the days when I was a little girl and would get punished whenever I would disobey my parents or get into some kind of mischief. However, what I had experienced wasn't a simple wake up call, it was pure abuse!

The joker would laugh every now and then at my pain, and would yell out almost insanely, "See how it feels Miss Dawes? Having no strength, no choice, no power to stop the pain? To my father, this was a hobby!"

No matter how loud I screamed, the joker never once let up…like his father before him, he showed no mercy. "You can wail all you want beautiful, but no one can hear you because this room is sound proof." He would remind me during this time.

I felt completely hopeless, completely humiliated and he hadn't even TAKEN me yet! I never dreamed that he would use this method to teach me a lesson.

But as I laid there getting whipped, I really began to feel what it was like for him as a child to have such a horrible father. Not that it made it right for him to give me the same treatment, but I understood now, and could finally really feel sorry for him.

When this dawned on me, most of my tears ended up falling for him, not for myself. At one point, I became numb to the pain and began to pass out. I didn't even realize when the joker had stopped, because I had been crying so hard.

It wasn't until I felt the joker un-cuff me and take me into his arms, that I had realized it was all over. I was too weak and in too much pain to move or do anything. So, we both just sat there on the bed for what seemed like an eternity. My lesson very well learned; my whole body aching.

His eyes looked almost dead; for once he wasn't making jokes about everything. I should hate the joker after what he did to me…I should want the desire to kill him right now, but I just couldn't bring myself to feel that way at all. I had been broken.

The joker shifted and I whimpered from the pain shooting up my body. "Shhhhh…I know luv." He cooed while gently rocking me, causing me to ache more.

My moans grew as I clung to his shirt and buried my face in his chest. "It hurts…"I cried quietly while he subconsciously rubbed my extremely sore back, chasing some of the pain away.

"Shhh…I know…Don't worry, you'll get used to the pain…you'll get used to it like I did…soon you can laugh the pain away." He laughed darkly after saying this…sending shivers up my spine.

Though his soothing voice was a comfort to me, his bitter words broke my heart. I wanted him to feel loved. I wanted him to know that someone cared. When I felt better, I would do my best to show him what love felt like if he would let me.

I began to feel drowsy; all that screaming and crying took a lot out of me. Despite my pain, I couldn't have been more content lying in the joker's arms.

I couldn't tell if his comforting me was just another joke to him or if he was really trying to make me feel better. Before this, I would've thought no. However, I saw a lot of his true colors this night, and I think he grew tired of never taking anything seriously anymore. Even if my theory wasn't correct, it was nice to be held after an awful experience like I had.

Tears clouded my eyes again when I realized that the joker probably didn't have anyone to comfort him after his father would beat him, and here he was comforting me, holding me like a little child.

He probably needed some comfort at this moment too, and being near me gave him some type of relief. Well, I was more than willing to give it to him.

I cried out when the joker rubbed a really tender spot on my back. "Shhh…hush hush…" he muttered while tightening his hold and rocking me again, still staring into space.

I sniffled back another fresh set of tears, and snuggled deeper into his embrace. I felt the joker's chest move as he chuckled quietly at my movement. "Now you're so willing to be mine?" He joked.

"Just shut up and hold me. You owe me at least that much." I mumbled while closing my eyes.

He chuckled again.

"You see little Rachel? You really are a child at heart."I heard him say as he gently moved a strand of hair out of my face.

"So are you…"I mumbled while drifting away. _"_The only thing missing…is love."

Before my world went black, I could've sworn I felt a tiny wet drop splash onto my forehead…. 


	7. Feelings

**Chapter 6: Feelings**

It was still dark when my eyes willed themselves to finally open. I remembered where I was when I felt the soft mattress beneath my body. How long had I been out? I began to move to get up, but when my wounded back screamed in protest, I remembered what happened, and realized that I couldn't really move. I wanted so badly to turn over on my back and survey my surroundings to see what was going on, but I knew that would only make me feel worse.

Moaning in frustration, I dropped my head back down on the pillow. I blushed when I realized that I was still only in my bra and slip. I took found the covers beside me, and drew them up to my shoulders. It took me awhile to realize that something was missing; it was far too quiet…

_The joker isn't here._

My mind reminded me.

My thoughts drifted back to what had happened between us earlier. I couldn't help but shiver when I remembered that lengthy, horrible beating he had given me earlier. I couldn't help but feel like a severely punished child at that moment.

I shuddered quietly at that thought. Were those his intentions? Did he want me to feel like a child? I couldn't help but notice how paternal he had gotten during that awkward time.

I nearly slapped myself when I actually admitted that it was kind of sexy. _Rachel! Get a hold of yourself!_ A part of me scolded. _You were basically abused by a murdering psychopath, and you think it was attractive? You're seriously messed up!_

I shook the reprimanding thoughts out of my head. It was true, I shouldn't be thinking those things, but I couldn't help it. However, my mind and body relaxed upon remembering what had happened after that fearful ordeal. The joker had actually held me, and comforted me. His actions still confused me as I thought about it.

He wasn't capable of that kind of emotion…or was he? I'm sure he had been once upon a time, but that bastard of a father had turned his heart cold and numbed his ability to feel. Somehow, during the last few hours that I was with him, I had unlocked the door and let out some of that lost little boy inside, who was still crying out for love and positive attention.

My eyes began to fill up with tears as I remembered being held by him. It was such an intimate moment. I couldn't forget that soothing voice he had used over me when I whimpered from the pain of my wounds, or the soft touch I felt from his hands whenever my body screamed out in torment.

Even if he had done a horrible thing to all those people, nearly raped me, and then beaten the crap out of me on top of that, it was obvious that there was still some feeling left in him.

Maybe, he still had some pieces attached to that broken heart of his.

At that moment, I wanted nothing more than to see him again. I already missed feeling his strong arms wrapped around me, cradling me like a child, holding me close to him as if he were actually afraid to let me go.

Confound it all, this man confused me! He barely even knew me, yet he somehow knew what made me tick.

I wanted to get up…I needed to get up off of this bed! I needed to breathe…I needed to stand for just a moment and think things over. I forgot about the pain in my back and began to sit up.

However, when I stood up completely, I nearly lost my breath at how stiff I felt and how much every part of me hurt.

Trying to hold back my tears, I looked around. Upon seeing no joker, I decided to walk towards the window. I choked back a sob every time I took a step, and I barely made it to the window before I began to fall from feeling so weak and wounded.

As I fell, I expected to feel the cold, hard tile meet my face. But before I could fully hit the floor, two hands suddenly wrapped around my waist, and I was swept off of the floor into the joker's embrace.

I couldn't help but feel excited at the sight of his make-up covered face. However, his gaze caught me off guard. His eyes appeared to be full of…dare I believe it…concern?

"Rachel Rachel Rachel…" He scolded quietly while carrying me back over to the bed. "What did you think you were doing beautiful?" He asked me darkly as his eyes narrowed in disapproval at my attempt to walk.

"I-I just wanted to stand and walk around…" I mumbled in reply.

He shook his head while wiping the remaining tears on my cheeks away in mild annoyance.

"Did you seriously…uh…thin-K tha-T you'd be able to move…after our little, hm…therapy session?" He asked, his voice returning to its mocking tone, yet still with a trace of seriousness in it.

I rolled my eyes while bravely fixing him with a glare. "Well, if you actually cared about my condition you retard, then you wouldn't have beat the crap out of me with your f'ing belt!"

The joker's eyes widened in surprise, before he suddenly let out a whoop of laughter. After a few minutes, he finally looked at me again and said with a giggle, "Oh pumpkin…you are jus-T too funny sometimes! One moment, you're sweeeee-T and…uh…caring. The next minute, you're uh…cussing up a storm with that feisty attitude I lo-Ve so much."

I struggled against his embrace in anger. "I hate you." I muttered, not really believing it.

"Aww I love you too precious!" He replied while laughing.

I began to push him away, and actually started to get up, but that didn't last for long. As soon as I sat up to move out of his lap, the joker stopped laughing and pushed me back down in his arms while sending me a stern glare.

"Ya know, you're far too stubborn for your own good little Rachel. That can ge-T you into trouble someday."

I snorted bitterly. "Ha! This coming from someone who actually practiced what he's preaching to me right now!" I laughed insanely at my words.

I suddenly felt the joker grab my face firmly in his hand and turn it to face him again. "I can do it again ya know." He growled darkly.

"You wouldn't!" I breathed in horror at his words.

"Don't tempt me Miss Dawes." He warned.

I growled angrily. "You know, you can be a real as-!" "Ah tat ta ta ta ta, that's enough…out of you little Rachel." His voice was severe again, putting me in my place and shutting me up immediately.

"Remember wha-T happened the uh…las-T time you insul-T-eD me…" He warned while stroking his hand across my still tender back almost seductively.

My eyes widened, and I shuddered and winced at the same time when feeling his touch.

Out of nowhere, I began to involuntarily shake at the mild threat he gave me. Even if I was in his arms, I sure as hell didn't want to go through that again.

The joker's eyes softened at my terrified expression after a moment, and he tenderly stroked my face with his cold hand. "Aw…shhh darling…you'll be fine as long as you follow my rules…kay?" He chirped while placing me on the bed.

I cried out when my skin scraped against the mattress. "Ooops!" He nonchalantly replied at my reaction.

Tears trickled down my cheeks at the burning sensation shooting up my whole back body. "Well…we'll uh…just have to do something about tha-T won'T we?" The joker said while gently turning me over on my stomach.

The familiar position made me forget to breathe, and I quickly clutched onto his sleeves while partially turning on my side. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" I practically screamed, in fear for my life.

The joker seemed confused by my reaction, and looked at me like I was stupid before replying, "Uh…well, I was going to put some uh, medicine on your back and legs for those sores I know you have. Bu-T uh, if you're gonna fight me like tha-T, I guess you can suffer if you want."

I felt like an idiot. "Oh…" I mumbled in reply. "I-I thought…never mind." I quickly turned back over, hiding my embarrassed face.

"You just want to be held again." I heard him giggle quietly as he took the lid off of some healing cream.

The coldness of the cream caused my body to jerk in reaction, but at the same time I sighed in relief at the feeling that spread throughout my body.

"Ya know, you have a really nice back." The joker said randomly after a couple of minutes of awkward silence.

"Um…thank you?' I replied with confusion at this compliment.

He laughed again at the tone of my voice. "Okay, so…I have to ask. Why in the world are you trying to make me feel better?" I asked with accusation in my tone.

"Well, I wouldn-T want little Rachel to be in pain when…uh, I finally play my game with her now would I?" He replied smugly while chuckling in delight.

I felt my body turn rigid at his words. _Great, he still wants to take me, that's just peachy!_I thought to myself while sighing in disbelief. "You're really sick ya know that?" I replied harshly at his words.

"M-hmmm…" was the reply.

"You're never serious about anything are you?"

"I try not to be. But you sure gave me a reason to be last night precious." He replied while giggling.

"I was asleep all day?" I asked with shock, not expecting that.

"Ye-P! And lemme tell ya…you look soooo cu-T-e when you slee-P sweetheart." I could hear the mocking tone in his voice.

"I'd rather you not watch me sleep in the future, if you don't mind." I replied sarcastically, fully aware that he wouldn't grant that request.

I could feel him chuckle as he finished up on my back. "Sorry cupcake, but I'll be doing quite a bit of that after you heal u-P!"

Furious, I finally rolled back on my back, not caring about the pain anymore. "God! Can't you just let me go and find someone else to do it with?" I yelled, not caring about how immodest I sounded.

He shook his head with a smirk. "No-p-e! I only wan-T you honey. 'I want you! I want you so baaaad!'"

"Oh jeez, please don't start singing that song!" I moaned as he continued to sing the song from the movie 'Across the Universe.'

"Why no-T? It was the only good song in there." He laughed out while beginning to do a really girly looking dance on the floor.

My eyes widened in surprise as he continued to sing it and dance to his own beat. It took all of me to not laugh, but that didn't last very long.

I finally burst out laughing at how ridiculous he looked.

The singing stopped at the sound of my laughter, and I felt pressure on the bed as the joker sat next to me. When I could finally breathe again, I opened my eyes to see him looking down at me with an expression of amusement.

"See? I knew I could make you smile." He boasted while leaning back with a satisfied grin.

"Only because you don't know how to be serious." I retorted while sticking my tongue out at him.

"Oh yes I do." Was the last thing I heard before I felt the joker's lips suddenly crash against mine…


	8. Giving In

**Disclaimer:**I don't own the song that is mentioned in here. But it's still amazing!

**Chapter 7: Giving In**

My lips went numb as the joker continued to kiss me passionately. I was so taken back by his actions, that at first I struggled violently against his kiss. However, his hand slowly slid up my back to hold me in place so that I couldn't escape.

My body gradually relaxed as his kiss softened. I closed my eyes, and began to savor the most amazing kiss I had ever had in the world! Heck, he was even better than Bruce!

My arms found themselves sliding behind his back to hold him close to me. He stiffened as I did this, but I refused to let go. _Please melt…please let me help you…feel me trying to love you…_ I thought to myself, more of a prayer than a plea.

I knew it shouldn't be right to even use the word "love" in the context of my mind. I barely knew the guy, yet I couldn't help but feel like I could feel that way towards him, and show him that someone cared.

Unconditional love was what he really needed and wanted, but he was too hurt, angry, and stubborn to admit it.

After a few minute, his kiss began to trail from my lips down to my throat. I moaned at the feeling of his warm lips on my skin. Yes, I knew there was no turning back now…I was beyond the point of no return.

As his kiss trailed from my throat to my collarbone, I began to massage his scalp with my elegant hands. I heard him sigh in pleasure as I rubbed his head, and then proceed to scratch it as well with my catlike nails

"Thaaa-T…feels soooo gooood…" He mumbled while momentarily stopping with the kisses, and resting his head on my chest.

_BINGO!_I thought to myself in triumph. I had just found his tender spot.

Poor guy, he needed a good massage. Maybe later, I could give him a back massage as well. That would make him really happy.

I noticed something different about his hair.

Although it was still green, it was no longer greasy. I leaned in closer to smell his hair, and was surprised when I got a whiff of what smelled like…green tea? _Wait…there's actually a shampoo for men with the scent of green tea? Wooooooow…_I giggled quietly at that thought.

The joker's eyes snapped open at my giggles. "What's so amusing beautiful?" he asked, his eyes sparkling with curiosity.

"I just think it's kind of funny that you used green tea scented shampoo to wash your hair. The name's also appropriate seeing as your hair is green." That's when I began to laugh hysterically.

For a moment, the joker stared at me with his eyebrows raised, but then he began to join me in the insane fit of laughter.

We both laughed until we cried, and I sunk into the bed the more I laughed. When I finally couldn't breathe anymore, I stopped and simply watched my captor as he continued to laugh.

It wasn't long before he finally quieted down, and looked down on me with a slight smile. "Well, we should laugh like that more often beautiful."

"Yes, we definitely should. After all, laughter is the best medicine isn't it?" I replied with a grin.

"Oh, certainly is pumpkin." He agreed while cupping my face in his hands.

I closed my eyes once more, relishing the feeling of his touch. He began to massage my cheeks gently, and I began to doze off. However, I didn't have a choice in that matter.

"Ah ta ta ta little Rachel…" His voice broke through my sleep, waking me instantly. "You jus-T woke up a little while ago. You can't fall asleep on my now." He lightly slapped my cheeks to chase away the sleep in my eyes.

Instantly, my feelings of affection diminished and my temper flared.

I growled in annoyance before boldly and roughly grabbing his face with my own hands. "NEVER. DO. THAT. AGAIN!" The joker's eyes widened in amusement, and he suddenly let out a whoop of laughter.

"Oooh! Someone's a little bit bipolar tonight!" He giggled while tapping my nose playfully.

I narrowed my eyes. "I don't like being woken up when I'm at peace and comfortable like that! It was definitely a turn off!" I scolded through my teeth, but then I slapped my hand over my mouth when I realized that I had admitted that out loud.

The joker only laughed away my grouchy reply. "Well well. Little Rachel likes i-T when I uh…touch her does she?" He said in that soothing, yet creepy voice I loved and despised so much.

I shivered as his hand softly ran down my naked stomach. "Ah, well uh…I can turn that frown upside down." His voice was dark now, and I gasped when I saw him flip that damn knife out again.

He grinned evilly at me before moving towards my bra with his knife. Before, I wouldn't have minded. However, I didn't want the joker to feel the satisfaction that he was taking me by force.

I wanted to feel like I had a hand in it too. I suddenly felt afraid…

I began to resist his touch, and shook my head wildly at his gesture. "no No NO!" I cried out, almost sounding like a whiny child.

The joker's eyes narrowed at my protest, and he immediately began to straddle me to hold me still. "Now now now," he began while grabbing my face in his large hand and holding it still.

"You don't want me to handcuff you to the bed again, do you precious? At least be thankful tha-T I'm allowing you to have your arms and legs free."

I only glared at him stubbornly, before pushing him off of me with surprising strength. That response caught him off guard, and he dropped his knife in the process of falling off the bed.

Taking my chance, I swiftly retrieved the knife, and positioned myself on the opposite side of the bed as he jumped up from the floor.

Upon seeing the knife in my hands, the joker looked at me in contempt. "Stay back…" I warned, shivering from his stare. He knew I hated that look he gave me. He knew that it affected and intimidated me.

"Rachel…" He began to say with his deep, chilling voice, "give me the knife." He slowly began walking around the bed towards me.

"Don't come any closer!" I shouted rebelliously, refusing to obey him. "Little girls shouldn't play with sharp objects." He chuckled darkly without smiling.

"You don't think I'll do it? I will!" I threatened uncertainly, not even able to convince myself.

The joker still made his way closer to me as I held the knife out in front of me.

"Rachel Rachel Rachel…" He tsked while shaking his head. "You know tha-T you coul-D, uh…never hurt a fly. Not even a big bad one like meeee…" He mocked while getting closer to me.

I stepped back towards the wall as he continued to walk towards me slowly. "Watch me…" I sneered while lunging at him.

The joker merely stepped aside as I went for him. When I realized that I had missed, I swung around to guard myself again, but I instead found myself violently thrown against the wall.

I crumpled to the floor, the knife still in my hand. I shook my head quickly, before looking up to see the joker standing over me. I quickly stood up, and repositioned my knife in defensive gesture.

The joker merely sighed and shook his head at my actions. "You never learn, do ya little girl?" The knife was suddenly ripped out of my hand and the joker had me pinned to the wall.

His hand was at my neck, while the other one flicked away the knife he had been holding.

I felt my body freeze, as he looked at me with those big, stern yet captivating eyes. "You uh, jus-T made the situation worse for yourself beautiful." He growled out while using his free arm to curve around my back, giving it a tight squeeze.

I whimpered upon feeling the pressure on my still tender back. The joker licked his lips as his hand began to slowly trial its way down to my butt. I gasped in surprise and humiliation.

"You perverted asshole!" I whispered angrily through my teeth.

The joker suddenly swung me around and administered a few hard smacks to my butt.

I cried out in pain from the feeling. That freak! He knew that I was still healing from my previous beating, and this just doubled the pain.

Tears instantly sprung in my eyes, and I gasped for breath after that painful yet somewhat thrilling sensation. The joker's hand still lingered where he had smacked me.

"What did I uh, tell you abou-T…using foul language little Rachel?" He admonished in my ear, while seductively pinching my rear in the process to mark his words.

I jumped and blushed at the sensation. I hated these feelings that were rising within me. A part of me wanted to hurt the joker for treating me the way he was; meanwhile, the other part of me wanted to show him empathy and affection.

Confused and uncomfortable, I looked down at my hands that were currently resting on the joker's chest.

A quiet cry escaped my lips, and I actually felt sorry for calling him what I did. "I'm…sorry…" I whispered truthfully, turning away from the joker and walking the other way.

I just wanted to be left alone.

However, I couldn't get very far. Even though I had enough freedom to walk away, the joker hadn't released his hold on my hand.

"Sugar, come back here." I heard him sigh quietly, his voice holding a note of apology in it.

That's when the floodgates opened for me. I felt a mixture of emotion (damn period), and I began to sob even harder and louder than before. Why? I didn't understand…part of it was because I wanted to go home.

Part of it was because I felt discomfited; part of it was because I wanted him to be happy, but his emotions kept going in waves. I was so emotionally exhausted from the events that had occurred, from trying to figure him out, and it was overwhelming!

I couldn't look at him, but he wouldn't let me go. I felt him gently pull me back to him.

"C'mere, hey…look at me…" he said gently while wrapping me in his arms again. I slowly tilted my face to meet his eyes, and sniffed back another fresh set of tears.

"Shhhhhh…" he soothed while holding me close to his chest.

The joker didn't really proceed to say anything. He merely looked at me with those dark eyes...

It was still befuddling me that I felt so familiar with the joker like this…

I know that I had been held like this before, and it wasn't by Bruce or even my mother…

Yet still, it felt so natural for him to be showing me this kind of affection!

However, he would deny it if I called him out on it. WHY did this feel more believable coming from him, than his psychopathic part?

I was going to hurt myself if I tried to think about it too much longer…

I felt him lean down to kiss my tears away; see, this was the part of the joker that I loved. Why couldn't he be like this all the time?

I felt comforted as he kissed me, and closed my eyes in content. I clutched onto his coat for reassurance.

"Rachel…can't you just behave like this more often?" He whispered while hugging me closer and rubbing my back soothingly. "I'll…I'll t-try…" I replied sincerely.

"That's a good girl." I heard him reply in approval. He then swept me up in his arms, and carried me back to the bed once more. The whole time he carried me, I nestled my face into the crook of his neck.

This time, he lay on the bed with me in his arms. "Now…where were we?" he asked while gently brushing my curly hair out of my face.

I looked at him with pleading eyes…words didn't need to be spoken from him to know that I wanted him now. I had given in…

Dramatically, he threw his coat off, before passionately kissing my lips again. I returned the kiss with my own fervent force, and didn't struggle when he took up his knife again and proceeded to rip off my bra.

Once it was off, I could feel the joker's breathing grow heavier, and his arms tightened around my waist as he dipped his head to kiss my breasts.

At that moment, I couldn't help but think of "The Point of No Return" song from "The Phantom of the Opera." If I had a voice, I would have totally begun to sing that song to him.

"_Passarino...go away for the trap is set, and awaits for his prey…"_

I nearly jumped out of my skin when I heard Gerard Butler's rich baritone voice suddenly fill the room.

I looked at the Joker questioningly, and he had a remote in his right hand, pointed at the stereo. A smirk graced his mouth as he saw the incredulous look I gave him…

"You must be telepathic!" I whispered, my gaze never leaving his.

"Somehow I just knew this was a favorite of yours as it is mine too. Not even I can resist the dark beauty of this song."

I instantly melted at his apparent thoughtfulness. I couldn't help feeling surprised, seeing as this didn't seem like his style of music.

The joker was now humming along with the phantom where he was singing: _"I have brought you that our passions may fuse and merge!"_ His hands moved to my slip. _"In your mind you've already succumbed to me, dropped all defenses, completely succumbed to me…"_

His hands gently dragged my slip past my thighs as the phantom continued to sing, _"Now you are here with me, no second thoughts. You've decided…decided…"_ He threw my slip away...

_"Past the point of no return…no backward glances. Our games of make-believe are at an end." _He took his knife, and moved towards my black underwear. _"Past all thought of "if", or "when." No use resisting, abandon thought and let the dream descend…"_

I was fully exposed to him now.

_"What raging FIRE shall flood the soul?"_ The Joker's humming somehow became intense on this part.

_"What rich desires unlock its door, what sweet seduction lies before uuusss?"_ As if to mark that particular verse, his hands ran all up and down my body, and I moaned in pleasure.

_"Past the point of no return…"_ the song continued to play while the Joker removed his coat and vest.

_"The final threshold! What warm unspoken secrets will we learn?"_ He began to remove his pants at last.

"Beyond the point of no…retuuurn…" The Joker finished, actually singing those last words with the Phantom. By the conclusion of this seductive song, he was fully exposed just like me.

"That...was…so beautiful." I breathed, my eyes open wide from the beauty of his voice.

"So are you my kitten…" He replied while taking his seat back next to me.

He looked at me…his eyes appearing to ask my permission. Silently, I nodded my head, signing myself over to him for the rest of the night.

"You're miiiine…" he growled triumphantly.

_Looks like Don Juan got his triumph…_Was the last thing I thought before everything became a blur…


	9. Never Let Go

**Disclaimer:**I don't own the song that is sung in here, but you will all love it anyway!

**Chapter 8: Never Let Go**

I woke up at an intermediate time.

My eyes snapped open upon feeling the chill in the room, and I sat up in bed. Upon feeling the chill of the air in the room, I remembered that I was naked, and quickly covered myself with the comforter.

I looked toward the window, and realized that it was still dark outside. _What time is it?_I wondered while looking at the clock in the wall. _3:30._ I sighed and plopped back down on the bed. _Great, nothing to do until it's actually daytime._

A soft intake of breath caused me to look next to me. The joker was right there…still asleep.

Immediately, images of the previous night filled my head. _So…we actually made love…_ my mind reminded me wryly. I gasped upon the reminder! That's right, we had made love!

Although it had all happened very quickly, I couldn't deny the feelings of ecstasy and joy I felt throughout the whole experience.

The joker had been rough at first, but after hearing my constant whimpers, he became gentler with me.

I browsed over my thoughts of the events that had happened these last few days.

The joker had originally wanted to rape me and be done with it.

However, after foolishly taunting him and daring to say some cruel words on his behalf, I had received a harsh treatment for my actions. While it had been painful, it also awakened me to his inner pain.

I began to realize what the joker had gone through as a child.

The poor love…he had been hurt so many times in his life, and while it was no excuse for the murders he had been committing these last few weeks, he still needed someone who really understood and sympathized with him.

It wasn't long before the joker began to admit in his own special way that he had actual feelings for me. However, he still had the problem with his obsession and possession over me, but I couldn't hate him for it.

Who knew that by showing sympathy and love towards him, parts of his icy heart would begin to melt for me?

So now, here we were…officially lovers…at least I thought. I was never a 'one-night-stand' person.

I looked at him as he slept. Part of his make-up was still on, but some of it had melted off during our ardent dance last night in this bed.

I stroked the part of his face that no longer had make-up on.

He really was quite handsome. Even with the scars on his face, I didn't find him horrifying. In fact, they made him give off this masculine vibe that sent shivers of excitement up my spine.

I began to trace his scars lightly, hoping he wouldn't wake up. I let out a small squeak when I suddenly felt him grab my wrists and pull me on top of him.

His hands enveloped around my lower back, and firmly held me there so that I couldn't escape. I expected to see his eyes snap open, but they didn't. _He's still half asleep,_I realized.

I began to giggle quietly upon thinking about how ridiculous I must've looked on top of him. I began to shift a little so that I'd be more comfortable on top of him.

"Be still…" he muttered, still in between the stages of dozing and awareness.

Realizing that I'd be here for a while, I sighed and laid my head down on his chest.

"Yes master…" I teased quietly while twiddling his curly hair with my fingers.

I knew he couldn't hear me, but I didn't care.

I began to think about what would happen when I was eventually found. I knew that Batman would find me before long, and I would be taken away somewhere safe again.

_Somewhere safe…_I repeated the words in my head.

The problem was, I did feel safe…right here and now…in the joker's strong, warm arms. How could I ever explain that to Bruce…or to Harvey?

Doubtless they would both be angry at the joker for kidnapping me. Batman would almost kill him, and Harvey would then file a huge lawsuit against the joker and send him back to Arkham where he could get some help.

_THIS is exactly the kind of help he needs, and he's getting it through you Rachel._My mind reminded me gently.

Even if there were some Psychiatrists who were trained and ready to help mentally sick patients at Arkham, they would never get through to the joker like I had in just a few days.

He needed someone who could do just more than listen and give him prescribed medication as an answer to his problems. He needed unrequited love; he needed a friend; he needed me…

Even though I am a lawyer, my heart is still as big as my head. While I may desire for justice in the world, I could never deny the feelings of compassion I have felt for many of the criminals I had helped put away.

I knew that if I were to show it, however, it would be my downfall. That's why it's my secret…it's between me, my heart, and God.

I never thought I would get a chance to actually express my feelings to the most wanted and feared criminal in Gotham. Yet here I was, pouring out my kindness over him who needed it.

I leaned forward silently, and placed a soft kiss on the joker's lips. "I think…I love you…" I breathed. I knew without a doubt, that I meant every word of that phrase.

Laying my head back down contentedly on his chest, I closed my eyes and fell asleep to the rhythm of his deep breathing.

"NO! DON'T HURT ME PLEASE!"

I was jolted awake by the anguished cry.

Startled, I looked down to see the joker writhing beneath me, struggling to get away from something unseen.

He was having a nightmare!

My heart lurched for him while I continued to watch dumbfound as he struggled with himself.

"Joker?" I breathed softly, not knowing what else to call him. I sat up quickly, but didn't move off his chest.

"PLEASE DON'T BEAT ME! I PROMISE I'LL BE GOOD!" He continued to beg for mercy.

My eyes filled with tears as I realized that he was dreaming about his father. "Joker!" I called out forcefully, while grabbing his shoulders and roughly shaking him.

"DAD! I'M SMILING SEE? CAN'T YOU SEE ME SMILING?" He wailed out again, his face contorting from horror to pain.

"JOKER!" I yelled this time, not caring if it scared him awake.

Suddenly, he stopped thrashing. I looked down on him, expecting to see him wake up, but he just laid there.

All of a sudden, his mouth opened wide in horror as his hands slowly moved up to where his scars were. Rubbing his hands all over his face, he began to chant in a haunted voice, "I'm unloved…I'm alone…I'm worthless…"

I choked back a sob when I realized that he was dreaming about the time he got his scars.

I shook my head as he continued to chant those awful words. "Unloved! Alone! Worthless!" His wails turned into insane laughter, as he grabbed his head and began shaking it wildly from side to side.

I shook my head numbly, not wanting him to believe those ugly words.

"No…" I wept quietly while trying to take his thrashing hands in mine.

"UNLOVED!" He laughed crazily again while unsuspecting tears began pouring out of his own eyes.

"You are loved joker! I love you!" I whispered while catching his hands in mine and holding them close to my heart.

"ALONE!" he laugh-sobbed out painfully. "I'm right here joker…I'm here with you!" I exclaimed in a louder voice, desperate for him to hear me.

"WORTHLESS!"

"You are not worthless!" I bawled out while shaking my head vigorously. "You're not worthless! You can become better! Let me help take the pain away, PLEASE!" I begged as my shoulders shook with sobs.

"NOBODY LOVES ME!" The joker proclaimed in a heart-wrenching roar while he began to thrash around again.

It was at that moment that something inside of me snapped…out of nowhere, I heard a name spoken in my head. I wasn't sure why that particular name popped in my head.

It was a name I hadn't thought about for years, a name I tried to dispel from the hauntings of my past…but for some reason, I knew I had to use it on this disturbed man.

Tears streaming down my face, I leaned close to his face and brought my lips to his ear. "Jack…" I whispered serenely.

In an instant, his eyes snapped open and his hand was around my throat before I could blink.

He swiftly spun me around and had me pinned up against the bed headboard. "What. Did. You. Call. Me?" He growled dangerously, tears still pouring out of his hate-filled eyes unnoticed.

"J-Jack…" I whispered again, my hands softly moving up to stroke the arm that was almost choking me. The joker's breathing deepened, as I looked him strait in the eye, wanting him to see the love that was there.

"JACK. DOES. NOT. EXIST!" He roared forcefully as his hold tightened around my throat. I winced in terror, trying to catch my breath.

So that was his name…how…**ironic**…

Well, I wouldn't give up…I would reach him…I WOULD!

My hands slowly made their way to the joker's hands that were clenched around my throat. Instead of trying to pull them off, I tenderly stroked them with my own.

"Jack…" I croaked out again, not letting my fear silence me any further.

I continued to stroke his hands. "Jack…" I said again as his hold began to lighten around my throat.

I watched as his expression slowly turned from furious, to anguished. Finally yielding to my tenderness, the joker's hands completely slid from my throat and his head drooped down in defeat.

I watched him for a moment, unsure of what to do. "J-Jack?" I asked again, my voice full of concern.

His shoulders began to shake visibly, but no sound came out of his mouth. I moved closer to him, and put my hands on his shoulders.

His head suddenly whipped back and a howl of wicked laughter escaped his lips.

I looked at him sadly as he continued to laugh. He wasn't fooling me, I could hear the pain in his laughter…it was there…

Cautiously, I moved to take his hands again. "Jack…"

His hand suddenly withdrew from my touch, and he covered his face, almost as if in terror of me. I gasped and drew back at his reaction.

He continued to laugh and hide his face.

Gradually, his laugh began to quiet down, and it turned into something else I never thought I'd hear.

I began to realize with shock that his laughs had been replaced by quiet sobs. Tears re-gathered in my eyes as I leaned forward to his cowering form.

"My love…" I said lovingly as my hands began to stroke his downcast head. Upon feeling my touch, the joker looked up at me.

What I saw broke my heart.

The black paint around his eyes was trailed down his cheeks as tears of anger and raw emotion continued to stream down his face. He had an expression of complete distress and grief that made every part of me melt.

My hands slowly moved down to his face. Crying quietly, I began to wipe away the tears that were running mercilessly down his white cheeks. As I wiped them, his make-up began to smear onto my hands.

The joker began to cry and laugh at the same time, even harder and louder than before, yet he didn't turn his head away from me this time.

"Oh Jack, let it out…" I encouraged with a pained smile while stroking his cheeks.

His shoulders began to heave with heavier sobs as I held his face in my hands. I couldn't take it any longer.

I threw my arms around the neck of the insane, crying-laughing man, and held him close to me.

"I'll never let go Jack…I'll never let go. I'm right here…don't be afraid of me…it's okay to cry…" I wept quietly while rocking him slowly.

The joker finally willed himself to wrap his own arms around my small form, and his head drooped down to my shoulder. "Shhhhh…" I soothed as I brought him to lay back down with me.

He never stopped crying as we laid in each other's arms. His arms around my waist, my hands around his head, I kissed him continuously for every tear that fell out of his bloodshot eyes.

"D-don't leave me…" I heard him choke out at one point. He sounded like such a small child when he said this, and felt like one too as he moaned in my arms.

"I'll never leave you love…" I answered as he buried his face into my chest, trying to compose himself.

I wanted to calm him down…it was good that he was finally giving in to his emotions, but I didn't want him getting himself sick with this constant crying and laughing together.

I found myself quoting words that my own mother had said to me, plus I had heard at church once when I was little.

"I will never leave you nor forsake you…" I whispered softly. My mother would tell me this anytime I felt alone or scared…

The joker only continued to weep and laugh heavily in response to my words of love and peace. I felt more like a mother comforting her child than I did now.

I remembered how he had comforted me after I was punished earlier by him, and now, I was able to return the favor.

As maternal instincts rose within my chest, I felt the sudden urge to sing to him.

"Nothing's gonna harm you, not while I'm around…"

I began to sing softly while trailing his cheeks with my soft kisses.

"Nothing's gonna harm you darling, not while I'm around."

I ignored his resilience against my embrace as I sang to him…I only clung tighter to him.

"Demons are prowling everywhere, nowadays. I'll send em' howlin' I don't care, I've got ways."

I felt the joker's laughter and crying die down while listening to me sing.

"No one's gonna hurt you, no one's gonna dare…others can desert you, not to worry whistle I'll be there…"

He finally stopped trying to get out of my hold, and relaxed against me. I sat up a little and stroked his face while continuing to sing.

"Demons will charm you with a smile, for awhile, but in time…"

He closed his eyes with what appeared to be relief, and finally leaned into my embrace as I rubbed his back and held his head tenderly.

"Nothing can harm you…not while I'm around…" By the time I had finished singing those words, I was cradling the joker like a baby, as he had cradled me before.

I continued to hum that same tune over and over again, hoping he'd forget the nightmare.

His eyes were closed, but I knew he was still awake. At one point during my humming, the joker looked up at me and gave a very small, yet very real smile.

I'd seen that smile before…but where?

Trying not to think more about it, I smiled back down at him, my humming never ceasing.

"Angel…" He murmured quietly while smiling more with his usual crazy grin.

"Shh don't do that Jack…you're alright now…" I soothed while smoothing back his hair with my hand. I leaned down and planted a kiss on his forehead.

As I began to pull my lips away from his forehead, I suddenly felt his hand bearing down on the back of my neck, stopping me from sitting up fully. I looked into his eyes questioningly…waiting for what he had to say…

"Thank…Thank you…." He whispered as his lips quivered. I smiled upon him, and uttered a contented sigh when he brought his lips to meet my own…

As we kissed, I never ceased comb my fingers through his hair. I really, truly, deeply, loved him…

"Rachel…" I heard him breathe when our kiss finally ended. "Hmmm?"

"I…I think I love you…too…"


	10. Getting to Know You

**Chapter 9: Getting to Know You**

I was pleasantly surprised to wake up in Jack's arms. However, I hadn't fully opened my eyes yet, which was nice because I didn't want to disturb what he was doing. I could feel him playing with my hair, while occasionally stroking my cheek with his hand. I wanted to smile, but I didn't.

At one point, I pretended to roll away from his grasp, as if I were still asleep. "Ohh no you don't…" He whispered possessively while gathering me more firmly in his arms.

My heart soared at feeling so secured within Jack's embrace. I knew then that he had to love…no matter how much he denied it, I would always know the truth.

I grunted in fake protest at having my position being disturbed. "Ah ta ta little kitten you're staying right here."

A small smile began to tug at my lips, but I tried to suppress it.

"I know you're awake honey bunch, so you can drop the 'I'm still asleep and like having the most wanted criminal in Gotham feel me up act.'" My eyes snapped open and I slapped his arm playfully.

"You jerk!" I laughed out, "You were not feeling me up, you were simply holding me, and I liked that for the record."

The joker shrugged while licking his lips. "Yeah well I knew it would get your attention anyway, so I used it."

I shook my head while rolling my eyes. "Ya know hun, there are other ways of getting a girl's attention."

"Oh? Like what pray tell?"

Oh please! Like he didn't know…

"Well, for starters you could get your girl some breakfast and maybe a new change of clothes and a shower."

The joker giggled in delight at my response. "Well I wouldn't want my little kitten to starve now would I? But I thought you'd be full after last night's delightful feast." He laughed at his own crude joke.

"Nooooo…" I groaned out. "That's not what I meant smart ass. Even people like me need to eat."

The joker nodded while laughing some more. "I know and you will get your wish your highness. But first, you're probably wanting that shower and change of clothes."

I nodded my head eagerly. "Yeah…so maybe you could let me go shower now?"

"Okay!" The joker chirped while picking me up again and carrying me over to the bathroom across the room.

"Um, I meant ALONE!" I protested as he closed the door behind him once we were in.

He shrugged casually while throwing his arms up dramatically, "Well ya never said alone darlin." Then crossing his arms nonchalantly, the joker sat on the sink and waited for me to undress.

"Ha ha ha ha…you're funny clown. Now get out!" I growled out, a little bit irritated that he couldn't give me some privacy.

The joker's eyes widened and he shook his head slowly while tsking. "Goodness, so rude! And to think, everything in here belongs to me and you're demanding me to go away as if you own the place."

I snickered in spite of him, "Ha! Everything belongs to you, fat chance! You probably just broke into this apartment and killed the previous owner."

The joker chuckled while shaking his head again. "For you information little girl, I found this apartment fair and square and no one was living in it. As for everything else, I'll admit they are stolen goods."

"HA! I WIN!" I squealed triumphantly while throwing my arms in the air. "But no seriously, if you want me to kiss you at all tonight, you'll go away and get me food while I freshen up."

The joker made a dramatic bow while saying, "Yes your worshipfulness. I'll go right away!"

Ignoring his sarcasm I administered a pleasant "thank you" before pushing him out the door.

"Oh sweet cheeks? One more thing." I heard him say before I could fully shut the door.

Sighing, I opened it again. "What?"

He pointed to his lips expectantly.

Laughing quietly, I walked up to him and kissed him full on the mouth.

However, the pleasant moment ended quickly when I felt the kiss of his palm smack a few hard ones on my rump.

I yelped in protest at the painful feeling.

"That's for swearing earlier missy." He scolded gently while smirking at my discomfort.

"Also I just couldn't resist."

I pouted adorably while looking innocently into his eyes. "That hurt! You're mean!"

He merely laughed while stroking my cheek tenderly. "Sticks and stones love. Now, I don't want to uh…hear anymore foul-uh mouthedness out of you, okay princess? You're far too beautiful to be uttering such vulgarities."

Then kissing my forehead, he began to walk towards the door before I could reply.

But I decided to test him further. So, master joker didn't like me swearing eh? Well, he'll love this!

Taking a deep breath, I stepped inside the bathroom before yelling at the top of my lungs, "YOU'RE GRANDMOTHER IS A-" and a string of all kinds of words I had ever heard escaped my mouth.

Any other day, I would never have said such things, but I wanted to get back at the joker for smacking me against my will. Plus, I just loved to bug him.

In an instant, he whirled around and glared at me in shock with his mouth agape. "EXCUSE ME YOUNG LADY?" He then began to charge at me.

Laughingly, I quickly slammed the bathroom door and locked it right as he was face to face with me.

I could hear the loud thud as he ran into the door. I fell to the ground laughing at the picture that went through my head of the oh-so-infamous villain running hard into a door.

I was still laughing as he pounded on the door and yelled all kinds of threats at me. "Damnit Rachel Dawes, when I get a hold of you later you will wish you hadn't disobeyed me or slammed that door in my face!"

"Oh come off it freaky face!" I laughed as I began to undress. "Consider it pay back for your cruel treatment of a lady."

The poundings stopped immediately. "A lady huh?" I heard the scoff on the other side. "No lady would say what you just did."

"I'm not listening!" I replied in a sing-song voice as I turned the water on and began to step in the tub.

"RACHEL! YOU'D BETTER NOT IGNORE ME!" I heard the warning yell on the other side.

I knew he wouldn't try to disturb me; he was in far to good a mood right now. But then again, I remembered that he could change moods at the speed of light.

"GO GET MY FOOD YOU CRAZY FOOL!" I shouted while laughing.

Silence…

I nodded at myself in triumph that I had gotten the last word.

I sighed in relief as the feeling of warm water poured over my pale, cold flesh.

I loved being clean, plus I knew it would make him happy too.

I must have lost track of time, for it felt like only five minutes had gone by before the shower curtain was suddenly thrown aside and the joker was standing there with a grin on his face.

I shrieked at his sudden appearance and tried to cover myself as I glared at him, "HEY! GET OUT OF HERE YOU PERVERT! I'M TRYING TO SHOWER!"

"You've been in there for over twenty minutes sweet cheeks; you're using all my hot water. It's time to get out." I blushed as he reached over to turn the water off.

"You could have just knocked you jerk!" I retorted in embarrassment.

"Oh stop it. It's not like you would have answered me anyway."

"JUST GIVE ME THE F'ING TOWEL!" I shouted angrily.

"Why? It's not like I haven't seen you like this already beautiful." He replied with a giggle while staring at my body.

I growled and grabbed the towel that he held in mid air, teasing me to catch it.

I quickly wrapped it around me before whirling round to glare at him some more. "I really don't like you right now Jack."

At the sound of his real name, the joker stopped laughing and his body went rigid. He looked like he wanted to strangle me, but something in him compelled him from doing so.

He growled before stepping back and dashing out the door.

Oops…

A couple of minutes later, I walked back out in the cute Tommy Hill figure shorts and navy blue tank top he had bought me.

The joker was sitting on the bed, his back facing me. I noticed the large plate of waffles, bacon, sausage, and eggs that was on the little bed stand. Where did he get that?

"One of my men just happens to be a cook in case you're wondering." The joker answered my thought, freaking me out a little.

"Thank you so much." I replied before taking the plate and seating myself next to him on the bed. No words were spoken those next few moments as I ate.

However, I didn't notice the way the joker was observing me the whole time I chowed down on my food.

When I finally finished, I turned my gaze back upon Jack who seemed to have taken on a serious expression.

"Why?"

The question was simple.

"Why what?" I replied with confusion.

"Why did you comfort me last night? Why did you risk death just to make me feel better after one of my usual nightmares?" His eyes bored into mine,

"You would never have killed me Jack." I replied calmly, trying to soothe him.

"Don't. Call. Me. That…" He growled out menacingly while gritting his teeth and clenching his fist.

"Sorry…" I apologized, not wanting to anger him. "But you know, anyone would have wanted to be comforted after a nightmare like you were having."

The joker shook his head as if he didn't want to believe it. "No one would have dared to…yet you did…you risked my wrath just to make me feel better…why Rachel Dawes? Why do you care? I'm a criminal…a nobody…a master of chaos…a murderer."

I smiled sadly while scooting over to his side. I gently took his hand in mine, "That's what love is joker."

He snatched his hand away from mine. "Love…" He spat the word out as if it were poison. "Love is a sappy emotion that ends as soon as something goes wrong…love is fake…love is what makes people weak and vulnerable…"

"No…" I replied feeling bold.

"Love is patient; love is kind and envies no one…" That had always been a favorite quote of mine.

"Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude; never selfish, not quick to take offense. There is nothing love cannot face; there is no limit to its faith, its hope, and endurance. Love never fails."

As I spoke this, I took Jack's hand in mine again and gently kissed it.

The joker looked at me in astonishment. "Wow…I've never heard that one before." He replied bitterly. "Sounds like a poem…"

"In a way, it is, but it's also true." I replied with a smile.

The joker scoffed while leaning casually back into the bed. "I wish you could tell that to my old man. He never even knew the word or the meaning."

"Neither did mine…" I replied sadly without thinking.

Surprisingly, the joker didn't even question me about that those words…he just looked at me as if he **knew **something I didn't.

After a few minutes of him staring at me, he held his arms out to me and said, "come here." It was more of a command.

Willingly, I laid myself down in his arms and rested my head against his chest.

"You do realize that I'm never letting you go now precious, right?"

I closed my eyes in content and smiled. "I don't care…keep me all you want. I like being with you even if you are annoying at times…"

He chuckled at this.

"Besides, I'll be found eventually…by Batman." I added a dramatic emphasis as I said the name.

The joker only shook his head and tightened his grip around my waist. "He can't have you…"

"Do you have a choice?" I mumbled.

After a few more moments of awkward silence, I finally asked, "So, what are we going to do today?"

"Well…" the joker started thoughtfully, "Seeing as you're my captive, and I can't let you out,"

"Oh no, wouldn't want that now would we?" I replied sarcastically while glaring at the joker.

He merely ignored me and continued to say, "I thought we should both have a movie day!"

My eyes lit up at that suggestion. I loved movie days! "Sounds innocent enough…but it all depends on which movie." I replied while eyeing him suspiciously.

"Oh I don't know, does 'Sweeney Todd' sound good enough for you princess?"

I gasped excitedly at the mention of one of my favorite movies and musicals. "Hey! That's one of my favorite movies! How did you know?"

Jack laughed while tracing my lips with his fingers. "I make it my business to know…"

"Sweeney Todd…how appropriate." I said thoughtfully while laying my head back down on his chest.

"How's that?" He asked innocently.

"Gee, well let's see…the main character wants to get revenge on the world because of one man's crime against him when he was younger. He kills many people and has only one friend and she's a woman. Sound familiar?" I looked at him knowingly.

The joker looked around as if didn't understand me. "Yep, you've pretty much hit the nail on the head. As Sweeney said, 'we all deserve to die.'"

I sighed while shaking my head. "You're hopeless…"

"I know…"

Suddenly, I wanted to walk around the room. I began to push myself up from the joker, but was surprised and annoyed when he held me down against my will.

"No no no, my little cupcake…" He admonished gently in my ear, "you have to, hm…stay in Daddy's arms where you'll be nice and safe and warm…and mine…"

DADDY'S ARMS? WAS HE SERIOUS? I snorted and burst out into a loud laugh at his words.

The joker had a slightly amused yet annoyed look on his face.

"Daddy's arms?" I laughed out "I am not your little girl Joker…"

"Maybe not-uh. But good-uh daddies lo-oooove their little girls, and uh…like them to feel secured and protected no matter wha-T. So why shouldn't you call me daddy?"

He replied while smirking at my embarrassed look.

"Let me think…" I began while trying to keep the snicker out of my voice, "One, because good lovers and husbands also want their girls to be safe and feel loved no matter what, and two, if you wanted our relationship to be that of a father and daughter you wouldn't have made love to me already and kissed me over a million times."

The joker sighed in slight defeat. "Yes, but there are daddies out there that do that to their little girls too."

Instantly, our discussion wasn't so funny anymore.

My heart lurched in disgust and I burst out of his arms in a fit of rage. "DON'T SPEAK OF THAT LIKE IT'S FUNNY JOKER! IT'S NOT! DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY LITTLE GIRLS ARE ABUSED LIKE THAT EVERYDAY?"

I was backing away from Jack now, rage pouring through my soul.

The joker had shock written all over his face at my reaction.

"Hey hey hey now…" He began while getting up ad moving toward me with caution. "I didn't mean for it to come out that way Rachel…" His tone actually sounded apologetic when he said this.

GEEZE WHY DID HE HAVE TO BE SO BIPOLAR ALL THE TIME!

One moment he could be a cruel joking clown, then he could be positively evil, yet he had moments like this where I saw love and kindness in him.

"WELL IT'S A TOUCHY SUBJECT FOR ME JACK!" I cried out as I continued to back away from him, tears filling up my eyes.

Jack's eyes flashed upon my calling him by his real name. "Don't call me that Rachel…" He growled out while stopping in the middle of the room.

I sneered defiantly, "Why not JACK? You didn't seem to mind so much last night JACK after you had that awful nightmare JACK and I held you in my arms JACK and comforted your fears JACK and wiped away your tears JACK!" I knew I was pushing it again.

Who was I to talk about him being bipolar? Heck! I was the bipolar one!

I was surprised the joker hadn't charged me yet. However, he was glowering at me in calm anger that shook me more than his usual outbursts did.

"Rachel Emily Dawes, unless you want me to smack you again you will keep your mouth shut! I do not like being called that name."

My mouth dropped open at his threat!

HE HAD NO RIGHT TO THREATEN ME! I WAS THE ONE BEING TORMENTED AT THE MOMENT!

"Yes, I know your middle name does that surprise you-?"

"SHUT THE HELL UP JACK! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! I HATE YOU! I HATE THIS WHOLE DAMN CITY! I HATE THIS WHOLE WORLD! JACK JACK JACK JACK JACK!"

I taunted insanely as tears streamed down my face, already not caring about his threat.

That did it. The joker was at me in a flash, and could feel his arms wrap tightly around me.

I struggled and screamed as he picked me up and brought me back over to the bed and sat down with me in his lap.

However, instead of getting the promised punishment he'd threatened me with, I felt him begin to rock me gently and hug me tighter to himself.

"Shhh shh…Rachel…doll face, calm down…what is the matter?"

"Let me go…" I whimpered pitifully while making a pathetic attempt to push him away.

"Rachel…" He called me gently again yet still with authority…

He took my chin in his hand and raised it to meet his own eyes. "Tell me what is bothering you kitten. I don't like seeing you cry…"

I scoffed bitterly at those words. "Right, you just like to beat me senseless and hear me scream, or smack my butt and watch me squirm and yelp with that pleasure I know is in your eyes everytime!"

The joker's eyes narrowed and his hold on my chin tightened as he looked at me with disapproval.

"Rachel Emily Dawes, that's in the past and I apologize for hurting you like that when we first met. I should have just smacked you for your awful words instead of repeat the brutal behavior my father did on me as a child. But despite all that, it doesn't mean that I like seeing you cry."

I shook my head wildly as shivers convulsed through my body.

"LET ME GO!" I wailed in agony, wanting to curl up in a little ball and die.

"No. Not until you tell me what is wrong…" The joker replied stubbornly as I struggled in his strong embrace.

After a couple minutes of repeatedly pounding his chest with my small hands, I finally gave up and collapsed into his embrace, allowing my tears to fall freely; God how I hated crying.

The joker kissed me gently on the forehead while rocking me.

"Talk to me precious…What. Is. Wrong?"


	11. Painful Memories

Painful Memories

As his eyes bored into mine, I felt that strange sense of familiarity come over me again. I didn't understand why…but at that moment I couldn't stop to think about it.

Eventually, I let out the breath I had been holding in, and looked down at the arms that were wrapped around me.

"I…I was…when I was eight years old…I was-" I couldn't get it out; I was stuttering too much.

"You were what little one?" The joker asked softly, encouraging me to tell him.

"I was…I was raped…" I finally choked out as new tears filled my eyes and poured down my cheeks.

I felt the joker stiffen at this confession, but merely stroked my hair comfortingly before asking me in a colder yet still indifferent tone, "Who raped you Rachel?"

I shuddered while burying my face into the joker's chest. I didn't want to say!

I tried to make myself appear smaller in Jack's arms so that I would feel more protected against the fears and nightmarish memories that clouded my mind.

"Who raped you beautiful?" The question was asked again, yet with more authority.

"I CAN'T!" My cry was muffled as I kept my face hidden in his chest.

I felt the joker pull away from me and grasp my shoulders.

"No no no no…" I whimpered while shaking my head, not wanting to be pulled away from my safe little cocoon.

I tried to curl up and lean back into the joker's chest, but he wouldn't let me.

"No Rachel…" He admonished as if I were a child while he continued to hold me at arm's length. Great, he was going to pull that stunt again.

I refused to look up as I was crying too hard, but I could feel the joker lean into me as he said lowly, "Tell me who precious…"

For a second, my body went rigid, but it wasn't long before I began to shake and twitch uncontrollably, almost if I were having a panic attack.

I didn't feel the joker react; there was only silence as he waited for me to answer his question.

As I shook uncontrollably, I managed to pull my head up and look into my love's dark eyes. "I-It w-was…" I choked on my words.

"M-my…IT WAS MY FATHER!"

I screamed in agony while suddenly jumping out of his arms and running towards the bathroom.

I slammed the door behind me and sank down to the floor while burying my face into my hands.

It was a mistake for me to close my eyes, for the darkness only brought unwanted images…memories that I thought had long been eradicated after years of therapy…

Flashback

_I woke up to the loud screams of my beloved mommy. _

_I bolted upright from my bed and looked around myself in terror. What was happening? I ran for the door and opened it, and quietly crept towards the stairs._

_The nearer I drew, the louder my daddy's bellowing could be heard._

"_YOU LITTLE BITCH! I WORK HARD ALL DAY AND COME HOME TO AN UNCLEAN HOUSE! AND WHERE'S MY DINNER? WHEN I COME THROUGH THE DOOR, I WANT MY MEAL READY!"_

_I gasped quietly while putting my hand to my mouth in fear. What was he doing to mommy?_

_I heard mommy whimpering softly as more minor crashes were heard._

"_J-James…I'm sorry James! I was almost finished making your supper, our daughter had a nightmare and I had to go and make sure she was alright before I could finish on time!"_

_I heard a loud grunt as daddy knocked over what sounded like a vase. _

"_I DON'T GIVE A DAMN IF RACHEL HAD A F****** NIGHTMARE! SHE'S EIGHT NOW, SHE SHOULD BE ABLE TO SUCK IT UP AND DEAL WITH IT!"_

_I continued to creep down the stairs until I came upon the terrible sight of my mother on the floor, backing up against the kitchen wall, surrounded by broken valuables, as my father stood towering over her with fire in his eyes._

_He was drunk again…I could tell by the anger and hatred in his eyes._

_My mother gasped as she began to stand up slowly. I could see a large red mark on her cheek where my father had slapped her._

"_James! How c-can you say that about Rachel? She's still a little girl! Have you forgotten what it was like to be eight?"_

"_I SURE DON'T REMEMBER FREAKING OUT OVER A MEASLY NIGHTMARE!" My father retorted dangerously._

"_She was crying James! My baby was scared and needed me! That's what mamas do." _

_My mommy replied with as much calmness as she could, but the tears never ceased._

_My father's eyes widened at her words. "THE LITTLE BRAT WAS CRYING! HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD HER NOT TO CRY OVER STUPID STUFF? OOOH, I'M GONNA GO GIVE HER A GOOD TALKING TO RIGHT NOW!" _

_Instantly, my father began stalking towards my direction. _

_I clasped my hands over my mouth, trying to keep the scream back that wanted to escape my lips. I was frozen and didn't know what to do._

_But before daddy could fully see me, I saw mommy jump onto him and cling on his back like a cat._

"_NO! DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH HER JAMES! SHE'S JUST A CHILD! SHE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG!"_

_My daddy growled while swinging his fists around angrily, trying to find a way to dispatch of the woman who clung onto him. _

_Eventually, I saw daddy back up against a nearby wall and slam mommy into it forcefully. _

_She gave a weak cry before letting go of him and sliding down to the floor._

_I couldn't take it anymore! As I saw Daddy raise his arm to strike mommy, I ran out into the open. _

"_NO DADDY NO! DON'T HURT MOMMY!" I jumped into the air and grabbed his upraised arm._

_Daddy grunted as he swung around to face me. I knew I was in trouble now…I had dared to intervene when daddy was dealing with mommy, and there would be huge consequences to pay._

_I gulped nervously as his eyes bored into my scared ones. "YOU DARE STOP ME?" He bellowed while walking slowly towards me. _

"_I-I'm sorry Daddy! But you were about to hurt mommy. Please don't be angry daddy. I-I can make you smile again…I c-can!"_

_Daddy laughed darkly as he continued to walk towards me menacingly. "Really? And what do you think will make daddy smile again?" He asked me snidely._

"_I-I d-don't know...maybe some ice cream?" I suggested while trying to smile a little, hoping it would make him feel better. _

_Ice cream always cheered me up when I was having a bad day._

_Daddy suddenly burst out laughing. But it wasn't a happy laugh…no…it was a scary laugh…the kind of laugh you hear when a villain from a TV show hurts or kills someone._

"_No…" Daddy replied in a deadly calm voice. "Do you want to know what would make me happy kiddo?"_

"_W-what daddy?" I asked as innocently as I could. _

_In a flash, I was pinned to the wall by my throat. I struggled in daddy's grasp, unable to breathe. "I'D BE HAPPY IF YOU WEREN'T ALIVE!"_

_Tears streamed down my eyes as I felt myself begin to lose consciousness. _

"_YOU BASTARD!"_

_I heard a faint thud followed by a grunt, and was suddenly let go and fell to the floor like a crumpled up little ball._

_As my breath returned to me, I saw that it was mommy who had yelled those words, and now was battling my daddy's angry blows._

_My mommy held a broom in her hands, and she was constantly hitting my daddy with it. _

_I silently prayed that she would be able to knock him out so that we'd be able to escape and get the police. _

_But soon, daddy caught a hold of the broom and yanked it away from my mommy's hands. He then began to beat her over the head with it._

_I watched in horror as mommy cried out and feel to her knees, trying to shield herself from the repeated, merciless blows. _

"_LEAVE HER ALONE!" I screamed while jumping onto his back, and began to hit his head and bite his neck to distract him. _

_My daddy howled in pain, and the broom was dropped instantly._

" _YOU LITTLE NAUGHTY BRAT!" My father screamed before grabbing me by the hair and pulling me off of his back. _

_I screamed at the painful feeling that spread throughout my head in an instant._

_I found myself on the floor, and being dragged towards the stairs._

"_MOMMY!" I sobbed out desperately while reaching out for my mother who was barely conscious._

_She could barely reach out her hand as she cried out hoarsely, "RACHEL!"_

_I struggled in pain and vain as my cruel daddy dragged me up the stairs by the hair. _

_Eventually, he reached down, tired of my screaming, and snatched me up underneath his strong arms. _

"_I'LL TEACH YOU SOME MANNERS LITTLE GIRL!" He bellowed as we reached my room at last._

_Throwing me onto the bed, I saw daddy start fumbling with the belt around his pants. My eyes widened in horror as I saw what he was doing. _

_I clambered to the floor and crawled beneath my bed, praying for a miracle. _

_But none came, for soon I was pulled out by my leg, screaming as I went. _

_I struggled violently as I was thrown across my father's lap._

"_YOU NEVER EVER HIT OR BITE ME! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME YOUNG LADY?" Without a moment's delay, I felt the hard slam of the belt against my backside. _

_I screamed at the fiery feeling, and continued to kick and beg for mercy._

"_PLEASE STOOOOOP! I'M SORRY DADDY! I'LL BE GOOD!" I wailed loudly._

_I lost count of the swats that rained over my whole body. Oh, the pain was so unbearable! I couldn't take it! Yet I knew I had no choice in the matter! _

_After a long time, I was too weak and hurt to fight anymore. _

_My body went limp and I surrendered myself to him as he continued to beat me mercilessly. _

_When he finally finished, I was thrown back onto my bed violently._

_My daddy then stood up and paced my room while I curled up into a little hurt ball, sobbing and hiccupping endlessly at the numbing pain that shot up my body._

_I closed my eyes and tried to blot out the sight of my angry father as he paced back and forth in my room_

_After a couple of minutes, I cautiously opened my eyes to see if he as still there. _

_My eyes widened as I saw daddy staring at me with a strange sense of calm._

_I whimpered in fear and closed my eyes tightly again, trying to get the sight of him out of my mind. How could daddy hurt me so? How could he hate me so much?_

_I could feel the mattress sink a little as my daddy sat down next to me._

"_Shhhh…" He began to soothe eerily while stroking my head gently._

"_Stop crying…I know it hurts kiddo. But you're sorry aren't you? Sorry for hitting daddy?"_

_I shivered and didn't answer. I was too scared._

_Without warning, my hair was yanked harshly, bringing up my head up to face daddy._

"_LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU BRAT!" He bellowed while slapping my cheek forcefully._

_I cried out at his brutality but forced myself to look into his hate-filed eyes._

"_Say you're sorry…" He commanded, his voice dark and evil sounding._

_Despite my fear, I felt unspeakable rage fill my soul at the sight of my daddy._

"_I hate you!" I hissed out while frowning at him defiantly. _

"_I wish you weren't my daddy! You're mean and hateful and bad! You hurt mommy and you hurt me! Daddies are supposed to love their little girls! But you don't love me!" _

_As I spoke, longing filled my heart at the lost feeling of not having a good daddy. I closed my eyes as more tears poured down my cheeks._

_I was expecting to feel him smack me again, but to my surprise no blows came._

_Instead, Daddy lifted me into his arms and held me close to him. _

_As much as I hated him at the moment it felt good to be held like that. Maybe he was sorry for what he did…maybe he was good after all…maybe he loved me._

"_You think I don't love you?" He asked while taking my chin in his hands and lifting it to meet his eyes. _

_I gulped while shaking my head, unsure of how to answer._

"_You don't think I'm a good daddy?" He asked again, his voice eerily soft. _

_I shook my head again, trying to hide my fear._

"_Well then, I suppose I'll have to show you how much I really do LOVE you, and how I can be a GOOD daddy after all." _

_My eyes widened in surprise at his words, and for a moment, my heart soared at the thought that he was going to make me feel better._

_However, my hopefulness soon turned to confusion and fear when I felt daddy's lips forcefully press onto mine. _

_I didn't like the feeling at all! I'd only seen him kiss mommy like that a couple of times, and I had always found it to be disgusting._

"_EEW! What are you doing?" I demanded while pushing him away and wiping my mouth in disgust._

_Daddy looked at me with fake hurt and confusion. "Why, I'm showing you that I love you…don't you want me to do that?" He asked while pushing me onto the bed._

_I shook my head as a new fear took a hold of my heart. "Not the way you're doing it daddy…" I whispered, my voice feeling like it had left me._

_Daddy suddenly pinned me to the bed and growled out, "Well, you don't have choice now do ya little girl?"_

_My mouth opened in confusion and horror as daddy then ripped my favorite nightdress apart with his strong hands, and threw it onto the floor._

_I screamed as he then reached for my underwear. WHAT WAS HE DOING? _

"_HELP ME! SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME! MOMMY! ANYBODY! HELP MEEEE!"_

**End of flashback….**

I screamed loudly as the flashback faded from my mind. My eyes snapped open and I began to thrash on the floor, not really myself.

I could hear the door handle being turned, but when it failed to yield, the door began to shake violently.

"RACHEL! OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW!"

I heard a voice on the other side bellow sternly.

My eyes widened in fear at the sound. "NO! DO'T HURT ME DADDY! I PROMISE I'LL BE GOOD! JUST PLEASE DON'T HURT ME DADDY!" I had forgotten where I was and whom I was talking to.

The door merely continued to shake, and I could hear the repeated loud poundings being driven into the door.

"Rachel, it's me! It's Jack!" The voice was softer now, but still held a firmness in it that chilled me to the bone.

"Sweetie, open the door right now!" The voice commanded me non-too gently.

I backed away in fear while shaking my head repeatedly. "No no no no…you can't find me…"

"Rachel Dawes, you'd better open up or I'll break down the door!"

"NOO!" I screamed fearfully while suddenly jumping up and flinging the door open.

Everything was a blur as I ran out of the bathroom and tried to open the door that led out of this terrible room.

When the door refused to open, I began to scream and pound on it endlessly.

"LET ME OUT! I WANT OUT OF THIS HELL HOLE! LET ME OUT!" I bawled desperately, now coming out of my stupor.

Before I could do any damage to myself, two arms were suddenly enveloped around my arms and waist, preventing me to move anymore.

"Rachel! Calm down!" A stern voice commanded while pulling me away from the door.

I struggled violently and continued to sob hysterically.

As I was being dragged away from the door, a large hand suddenly covered my mouth.

A sharp voice then began to whisper in my ear. "Rachel! Listen to me! I am not your father! It's me, Jack! I am not going to hurt you beautiful."

Instantly, everything came back to me, and I remembered exactly where I was and what had occurred the last few minutes.

My struggling stopped, and I relaxed in the joker's arms.

Upon feeling me become still, the joker whispered again, "Can I remove my hand from your mouth Rachel? Are you going to listen to me little one?"

I nodded my head faintly, exhausted and hurt.

When his hand dropped from my mouth, I could do nothing but stand there blankly.

I had cried so hard, that the only remaining tears were the one drying on my cheeks. I was too weak to cry anymore.

I felt the joker take me in his arms once more, and was suddenly lying on the bed again next to him.

The joker stroked my cheek for a long time, and I just basked in the silence and relief that spread through my body at being in his arms.

I should have been afraid of the joker…after all, he did beat me on our first night together, almost in the same manner my father had.

Up until that point, I had erased all memories of my father's cruelty towards my mother and I. When the joker claimed that I didn't know what he'd been through, when he began to beat me, he did not realize how wrong he had been.

During that time, I began to feel like I had been in that same position before, but I had been in too much pain at the time to remember anything about my past.

It hadn't been until recently, when the joker mentioned how some daddies abuse their little girls through rape, that my mind opened itself and all of the painful memories had poured back into my head without warning.

How could I have forgotten?

"I'm right here Rachel…shhh…I won't hurt you sweetheart…" Even though I wasn't crying any longer, the joker knew I needed major comfort, and this was the only way he would get a word out of me at that moment.

I savored the feel of his touch as he continued to cradle me, and felt myself calming down more and more as the minutes passed by.

"I'm sorry…" I finally whispered, not trusting my voice.

"No need to apologize precious. You have every right to cry beautiful. No child should have to go through what you did." He replied softly while planting a kiss on my forehead.

I stared blankly ahead of me while clutching onto the joker's arms that were holding me.

"My father…raped…me…" I muttered out slowly not really believing that it happened.

"I already knew that…" Came the soft reply.

Incredulous, I turned to face the joker questioningly.

"How could you possibly know?" I asked accusingly.

"Did you hunt down my old psychiatrist, and threaten her with her life if you didn't get my personal information or something?"

"No…"The joker shook his head slowly, ignoring the biting tone in my voice that would have normally earned a laugh or a glare had I not been in the current position.

My gaze softened at his honesty, but the question still lingered. "Then how did you already know?"

I saw him take a deep breath, almost as if uncertain whether or not he should answer me.

"I was there…"

_. _


	12. Unexpected

Chapter 11: Unexpected

My eyes widened at his words.

What the hell did he mean by that?

"Y-you…what?" I asked in disbelief, unable to concentrate on the words I had just heard.

"I was there Rachel…" He repeated again, looking into my eyes seriously.

I shook my head incredulously. "Wait…no…you-you weren't there! You couldn't have been! STOP PLAYING GAMES WITH ME JOKER THIS ISN'T FUNNY ANYMORE!" I screamed, holding my head in frustration and mental agony.

"Rachel…" His voice was softer now, "Look at me beautiful…" His voice calmed me down, and I reluctantly obeyed.

I looked into his eyes, and focused on only them for a moment…I never really noticed how beautiful his eyes were…they were so brown…and so full emotion that could tell a whole story…

Wait…something was unfolding…a familiar shadow out of my past…it was becoming clearer…

_**Flashback**_

"_DADDY STOP! STOOOOOOOP! HEEEEEEEELP-" _

_My screams were muffled by daddy's big hand. "SHUT UP BRAT! YOU'LL DO WHAT DADDY SAYS! Now…just hold still."_

_I screamed in painful agony as I felt daddy put himself inside of me. It hurt too much…I couldn't bear it! _

_I screamed long and hard. Nothing could stop him…no one could save me…_

_Suddenly, daddy yelped and stopped what he was doing._

_He whirled around and began to hit the shadow that had stopped him from further hurting me. "WHO THE HELL ARE YOU PUNK?" He yelled while swinging his fists._

"_Your worst nightmare!" The voice growled vengefully before delivering what sounded like a powerful kick to Daddy's face. I heard a grunt, then a loud thud, and finally…silence…_

_I stayed curled up in a ball and wept hysterically. _

_I didn't know who had come to my rescue, but I didn't want him to come after me next._

_I felt someone's hands stroke my hair._

"_GET AWAY FROM ME! BACK OFF!"_

_I began to struggle violently, trying to get away from my captor, but his hands held me down firmly, keeping my arms pinned down to my sides. _

"_Stop struggling…" A firm voice whispered to me._

"_PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!" _

"_Little kitten…" The voice whispered, calming me immediately._

_I opened my eyes at that familiar nickname and looked up in surprise. Even in the darkness, I could make out the face of my best friend who also served as an older brother. _

"_J-Jack?" I whimpered in relief_

"_Yeah I'm here little one. Are you all right? Did he hurt you?" He asked while gathering me up in his arms._

_Immediately, the tears began to gush forth again. "D-d-d-dad…d-daddy t-touched…he touched-m-me…" I hiccupped uncontrollably, unable to get the words out of my mouth. _

_I felt Jack hold me close to his chest. "Where did he touch you princess?" He asked me gently._

_My cheeks flushed in embarrassment, and I just squeezed my eyes shut tighter, not wanting to tell him. _

"_Rachel…" He breathed before taking my face in his hands and forcing me to look up into his eyes, "Where did he touch you sweetheart?" _

_I brought my mouth up to his ear and whispered the answer._

_I jumped back in terror when Jack growled suddenly and squeezed me tighter to himself. _

"_Why that disgusting filthy pig-hearted bastard!" He exclaimed in that deep voice that always scared me._

"_J-Jack?" I whimpered in question at the word he used._

_He looked down at me, his hate-filled expression softening at my terrified gaze. "Sorry baby doll." He cooed while stroking my hair. "Look, we need to get you help. Where's your mommy beautiful?" _

_I sniffled at he reminder of mommy. "She-she's on the floor in the living room. D-Daddy knocked her out when she tried to stop him from…from c-coming after me."_

_Jack gasped quietly while shaking his head. "Your mommy is a brave and wonderful woman precious."_

_I nodded my head in agreement. "I just hope she'd not dead…" I whimpered before bursting into another fit of tears. I couldn't stop trembling…I felt completely out of control…Jack's touch was the only thing that comforted me now._

"_Shh shh little kitten…" He soothed while tightening his embrace and rocking me tenderly._

_I heard Jack sigh as he rocked me back and forth. I closed my eyes against his chest, enjoying the warmth and love I could feel coming from him. _

_Oh how I loved him._

_Yes, it's true that he was quite a bit older than me. I was eight and he was fourteen._

_We became good friends the first day he had moved to our neighborhood. I was only seven at the time, and he had just turned thirteen._

_See, I was the only one who had ever been truly kind to him in his whole young life as a friend. _

_He loved that I always asked him questions, and never made fun of him for any reason, or appeared to be afraid of his cold behavior._

_He especially loved that I was intrigued by his magic tricks and jokes. _

_He always did like to make people smile, but not everyone has a sense of humor like Jack did._

_He really was a great boy._

_I've always been taught to be nice to everybody, even when they're mean. With Jack, all it took was one little smile and a, "Hello. I'm Rachel, what's your name?"_

_Since then, Jack and I were never a part._

_He was always there to make me laugh when I had bad day or when I was sad._

_And I always tried to make him happy and smile for me whenever he had a bad day himself. _

_At one point, I even had a crush on Jack. He always looked so handsome and strong to me, which made me think I had my own prince charming. _

_Of course, as our friendship grew, I became more content with the idea of him just being my best friend. _

_For over a year, we had known each other, and Jack had appointed himself the "older brother" role over me from the start of our relationship._

_I sat and enjoyed the comfort of having big brother Jack hold me and make me feel better._

"_My hero…" I whispered in his ear._

_Jack stroked my back lovingly. _

"_I'll be your hero anytime little kitten. It's all over now. He will never hurt you again pumpkin, I'll make sure of it."_

_Then Jack whipped out his cell phone and called what could only be 911. After he frantically explained the situation and gave the address, he hung up and then stood to his feet._

"_Where are you going? Don't leave me!" I cried frantically while clutching at his sleeve. _

_Jack spun back around and gently pulled my hands from his sleeve. "Shhh shhh don't worry sweetie pie I'm not going to leave you with this slime ball." He reassured me before picking me up in his strong arms._

_He gasped upon seeing the splotches of blood on my bed sheets. I squeezed my eyes shut at the sight, trying to forget all that had happened._

"_I swear, if the cops don't take that disgusting prick to jail, I'll send him there myself!" I heard Jack mumble angrily under his breath before walking out of my room and carrying me downstairs. _

_I buried my face in his chest as we descended. It wasn't long before I felt him place me in one of the kitchen chairs, which had a towel over it._

_The spot between my legs was horribly sore, and I took deep breaths and kept my focus on Jack to try and forget the pain._

_I watched as Jack went over and attended to my mommy in the other room. She was still lying where daddy had knocked her out._

"_Mrs. Dawes?" I heard him ask while lightly slapping her cheeks. My mother groaned while stirring a bit in her spot. _

_Jack stood up with a relived look on his face._

"_Didn't I tell you Rachel? Your mother is alive." He made his way towards me while holding his arms out. _

_A small smile crept onto my face upon hearing that mommy was still alive. Thank God!_

_I held mine out as well, and he swept me up in another reassuring hug. "Don't worry little one…" He breathed into my ear while walking over to the window by the front door, "Everything will be alright."_

_As I laid my head onto Jack's shoulder and closed my eyes, I could hear the distant sound of sirens drawing nearer and nearer to my house._

_Before I fell asleep, I felt Jack give my head a kiss. "I'll never leave you precious…"_

The images faded from my mind. As I came to, my eyes widened in realization; in disbelief, I looked upon the joker.

His eyes never moved from my face as I gasped and backed up and slammed myself into the bedpost. "Jack?" I asked again, unsure of myself. "J-Jack Napier?"

The joker nodded while smiling solemnly.

"Hello kitten…"


	13. Questions and Answers

Chapter 12: Questions and Answers

I looked upon the joker with disbelief…

No…it couldn't! Couldn't be him! My Jack never acted insane! He would never take innocent lives! Would he?

I shook my head in denial while laughing bitterly, "There is no way on God's green earth that YOU are Jack Napier! I remember Jack! He always looked out for me! He would never hurt me like you did when you first brought me here!"

The joker stared into my eyes patiently as I continued to ramble on all of my reasons as to why he just couldn't be Jack!

"If I'm not Jack…then why do I remember and still have the joker card you gave me as a gift when we were children…hmm?"

I scoffed at that question. "What do you think I'm stupid? You have millions of joker cards, they're your signature for God-sakes!"

The joker immediately whipped out a very worn down looking card that was obviously not from this decade…I could tell because the design on the card had an eighties look to it, plus it was abnormally large compared to the ones made nowadays.

On the back of the card was a note: _To: my favorite joker, From: Your sunny Ray. Use it to make others laugh like you do me. Love you always big brother!_

I knew then that nothing I could say would prove him wrong.

That was undoubtedly my handwriting, and there were too many things about the joker that were similar to my Jack; except for the insane murdering part.

"Oh mon ça alors vous c'est! Que la baise?" ("Oh my gosh it is you! What the f***")

The joker cocked his head before a fit of hysterical giggles shook his body. "Um…s-so when you're in shock-uh, you…hmm, shout random phrases in French-uh?"

I was just as bewildered as he was…where the heck did that come from?

I'm an intelligent attorney! I don't have time to be random!

"Focus here Jack! This is serious!" I snapped in reply. The joker's laughter stopped at my words, and his eyes narrowed.

"Rachel…" He said in a warning tone.

"Oh get over it Jack! I know you're not going to hurt me just because I said your name!"

The joker raised his eyebrows incredulously and began to walk towards me menacingly. "And how…do you know-uh, hm that…little Rachel?"

His hand was at my throat once more and his tone sent shivers down my back.

"Um…" I stuttered as his face pressed against mine. Dang it! How did he have the ability to make me nervous like that?

"Answer me!" He growled as his other hand wrapped around my waist and forcefully pinned me to him. "Say my name-uh again…how do you know I won't-ah, hurt you…little girl?"

Trying to collect myself, I raised my eyes to his and answered, "Because you would never hurt me. I'm your little sister, your friend…Jack."

His grip loosened and he glared in defeat before spinning around and pacing towards the window.

For once, he said nothing…he just leaned his head against the windowsill.

I just sat down and sighed, still in shock from the information I had just received. "All these years…all these years I spent worrying about you." I muttered to myself, unaware that Jack could actually hear me.

"Seems-uh…like a was-T-e of time-uh…Rachel." Jack grumbled in reply.

"A waste of time?" I asked incredulously while standing to my feet and slowly walking towards him.

"It was a waste of time to worry about my best friend and brother? Jack, you protected me a numerous amount of times! You saved me from my father!" I stopped midway as I felt the anger surge through my body.

I suddenly felt neglected.

"And then…after all that…you just left me. You left and didn't even take me with you…"

"I had-uh to…Rachel." I heard him say, his voice surprisingly gentle.

"WHY?" I demanded heatedly, as new tears built in my eyes again.

However, for the first time since I had been with him, Jack did not answer. No sarcastic blurbs, no stupid jokes, no laughter…nothing.

I was growing impatient.

"YOU LEFT ME JACK! WHY THE HELL DID YOU LEAVE ME!"

Jack whipped around and stormed towards me.

"TO SAVE YOU FROM THESE!" He thundered while pointing to his scars as he stopped in front of my face.

"I didn't…I couldn't let you see them-uh…Rachel. I couldn't protect you anymore. At least not from myself…."

Though my vision was blurred from the tears in my eyes…the images in my head swirled around me as though I were watching a movie.

_**Flashback….**_

_It was sleepy time…but I didn't feel like sleeping…I was too scared. I didn't like the night. I wanted Jack to be with me…I could only sleep well if he was there to chase my fears away. _

_Tap! Something hit my window…it was probably just a bug._

_Tap! Tap! Two things hit my window…more bugs?_

_Tap! Tap! Tap! Okay, now I was scared! I didn't want to see who was outside the window._

_Tap!_

_Maybe if I looked, it would go away…_

_Tap! I crawled towards the window, and looked out. There was a hooded figure outside in my backyard. _

_The figure waved it's hands at me and then made the bird call that only I knew._

_I realized then that it was Jack!_

_Instantly, I opened my window, and whistled back the tune "Whistle While You Work," which was the signal that everything was okay and he could come up. _

_If things were bad, I would whistle the chorus to "Thriller" to warn him._

_There was a latter in the backyard that Jack and I hid, for whenever he came over at night. _

_He quickly went to its hiding place, found it, and then ran back over to the wall, and put the latter up against it._

_He was up in a flash, and I moved away as he stepped into my room. _

"_Hiya Jack!" I whispered happily, glad to see my big brother. Jack accepted the hug, but groaned when I wrapped my arms around him. _

_I looked up, and noticed that his mouth was covered with a large handkerchief. All I could see were his eyes, and they looked weird…somewhat red…like he'd been crying. _

"_Jack? What's wrong?" I asked worriedly._

_Jack sat on my bed, and pulled me near him. "Listen kitten, I don't have much time. I have to go."_

_My eyes widened excitedly. "Go? Okay…I'll get my stuff!" Finally! We were going to run away together! I could hardly wait._

_I felt his hand pull me back firmly. "No kitten…you're not coming with me. You can't come with me."_

_Instantly, I felt sick. What did he mean I couldn't go with him? _

"_W-what?" I breathed out in disbelief. "B-but…Jack…you can't leave. You promised we'd run away together!" My eyes welled up at the thought of being away from him._

"_Ray, you don't understand…things have changed. I can't…I can't take you with me anymore." He whispered, as though he were in great pain. _

"_But why?" I nearly shouted, as my breathing grew heavier._

"_Hush!" He whispered sternly while covering my mouth with his hand. _

_I bit my lip to keep from crying out loud, but the tears did not stop._

"_Listen kitten, I'm sorry, but I have to say goodbye. Something has happened, something terrible. If I took you with me now, we'd be running forever, and I can't put you through that darlin'. I don't know where we'd go, or where we'd live."_

"_But I don't care! As long as I'm with you, everything would be okay!" I pleaded, as I began to get choked up. _

_Jack merely shook his head and pulled me closer so that I was standing in between his knees. _

"_Kitten, running away isn't as much fun as the movies can make it seem. It's a tough life to live, and your mommy would have the police searching for you everywhere."_

_I shook my head. "B-but she would stop making the police chase us if she saw that I was okay and with you." I retorted, trying to sound hopeful, but knowing that deep down it wasn't okay._

_Jack snickered bitterly at my words. "If anything princess, I'd be arrested for looking like I kidnapped you. That would just make it worse, and then I'd never see you again for a long time."_

_My lip began to tremble as I realized that I wasn't going to get my way. I was about to tell him that mommy would never have him arrested, but my eyes zeroed in on the cloth around the bottom half of his face. _

_It appeared to be stained by something…but what?_

_I couldn't see very well in the dark, but something told me that whatever was seeping through the cloth, was not a joke._

"_Jack, why do you have your face covered?" I asked curiously, momentarily forgetting why I was upset in the first place._

_I reached up my hand to touch the cloth, but as soon as my hand lightly touched the fabric, Jack suddenly reclined and pushed me back roughly. _

"_STOP!" He hissed loudly while standing up. I fell onto the floor with a thud. _

_I may have not been hurt, but his reaction scared me and made me sad. _

_As I looked at him sadly, I began to curl up in a little ball and sob quietly. _

_I didn't understand what was happening…why was Jack leaving me? Why couldn't he take me with him? Why wouldn't he show me his face?_

_I heard his footsteps a he neared me. "Ray…" he whispered softly. I didn't look up; I didn't want him to see me cry. _

"_Kitten, please look at me," he said softly while kneeling down to my level. I allowed myself to sit up, but I refused to look at him._

_I felt Jack gently take my chin in his hand and tilt it upwards to meet his anguish-filled gaze. _

"_Listen sweet pea, I'm sorry for scaring you like that. But I can't tell you…especially show you, why you can't see my face. It's a part of the reason why I'm leaving, and why I can't take you with me now."_

_Even though I was still confused and angry at him, I felt like I understood a little bit of what he was trying to tell me. _

_But I didn't like it…not one bit. _

"_Hold me." I demanded quietly while holding my hands out to him. _

_Jack sighed, before taking me into his arms. He sat against my bed and rocked me gently. _

"_I'm so sorry kitten…it wasn't supposed to turn out this way." He apologized as he set his chin upon my head._

"_You promised me Jack…" I cried into his shirt. "You promised me we'd always be together. That you'd never leave me… you're not supposed to break a promise."_

_I felt Jack's chest begin to shake slightly. I didn't look up, but something told me that he was crying as well. _

"_Believe me Ray," he whispered shakily, "this is different. I never intended to hurt you or break a promise to you. But if I don't leave now, things will only get more dramatic. I have to leave Rachel…I don't want to, but I have to."_

_I sniffled back my tears, trying to calm myself down. _

"_And besides Ray, you're mommy loves you and needs you, and you need her. You wouldn't want to break her heart by running away now would you?" He asked while running his fingers through my hair._

"_Nooo…" I moaned while hiding my face into his shirt again. _

"_That's what I thought." He replied as he began to shift. He pulled me with him as he stood up, and sat me on my bed. _

"_I promise you this Rachel," He began to say while holding my hands and gazing into my eyes. _

"_I will come back for you someday. When things get better, and I can make a living, I will come back for you and we can both be happy always."_

_I nodded my head slowly while yawning. "Promise?" I asked while wiping my eyes._

"_I promise kitten." He replied before ruffling my hair. "Now then, it's time for you to go to sleep."_

"_But I don't want to…" I whined as he forced me to lay down and began to pull the covers up to my chin._

"_Ah but you will…" He replied softly while tucking me in. _

"_Jack? Before you go, can I ask you one last favor?"_

"_What is it sweet pea?" He asked while stroking my forehead tenderly._

_I fought the urge to cry again, as I realized this would be the last time Jack did this for me. _

"_Would you…would you at least stay with me until I fall asleep? I don't like the dark…and you're the only one who can make me sleep well at night. Please?" _

_Even though I couldn't see it, I could hear the smile in Jack's tone as he nodded. _

"_Of course sweetie." He then laid down next to me and took my hand in his. "Go to sleep kitten. I'll be right here." _

_Even though I didn't want to close my eyes, I couldn't help it. They felt heavy, and I couldn't fight it any longer._

_Reluctantly, I closed my eyes, and felt myself fade away as Jack rubbed my hand comfortingly._

_My eyes snapped open as the sun shone on my face. I sat up, and looked over to my side. The bed was empty…Jack was gone._

_In the place of the emptiness, I saw a little necklace with half a silver heart chained to it. Beneath it, was a joker card with writing on it. I picked it up, and read the little note Jack had left for me. _

"_Look after my heart…I've left half of it with you. Don't forget kitten, I will come back for you. Jack."_

End of Flashback

My vision cleared, and I felt myself come back to reality. It all made so much sense to me now!

"You left me…because that was the night you got your scars…wasn't it?" I asked numbly, feeling like an idiot for not realizing it sooner.

"Is that-uh, rhetorical or should I…hm, actually answer that one-uh?" Jack asked without humor in his tone. 

"Oh my gosh…it all makes sense now!" I exclaimed quietly while shaking my head. "You were running away from your dad!"

"And the winner is…" Jack didn't finish the sentence as I interrupted him.

"But you lied Jack! You never did come back for me!" I said angrily while glaring at him.

"Oh, but you're wrong. I did-uh…come back for you…little Rachel. Or at least, I tried to." He responded while twirling his knife on his forefinger.

"What? When?" I exclaimed incredulously.

"It didn't take me long to find a job. Although it was unpleasant, it paid good money. About a year after I left, I had made enough to get a nice little apartment. I knew that with the money I was earning, it wouldn't be long before life would-uh get better. Soooo…I came looking for you. But, when I went to your house, you weren't there anymore. I asked around for you, and some of the neighbors didn't-uh have hm, straigh-T answers for me. Mostly because they were nervous or horrified when they saw my face. But finally, I came across a friendly lady who seemed to be very close to your mother. She told me your mother had gotten a job for some rich family, and had moved into a mansion. She gave me the address, and I went to find you."

It hit me again like a ton of bricks!

I remembered that not long after Jack had left, a wealthy but kind and generous man had employed my mom to work for him at his manor.

There, was where I had met young Bruce Wayne. We became close friends fast, and nearly everyday felt like a holiday with him around.

Yes, life had taken a turn for the better. But I had never forgotten Jack.

"When I saw that you were happily playing with that spoiled rich Bruce Wayne, I knew you had probably forgotten me. Plus, it would be hard to compare my little apartment with your new friend's castle-like manor. That's why I never came back after that Rachel. I may have been jealous of your new friendship, but I still wanted you to be…ugh…happy."

He spat the last word out as if it were some type of poison.

I looked down, feeling a little guilty to have judged him so quickly. I wasn't one to lose my edge so quickly, but Jack…somehow had that affect on me whether I liked it or not.

"Oh…what, now you're silent?" he sneered while staring at me with hard eyes.

"I…Jack-" I started to say, but then suddenly, I was interrupted by a loud bang downstairs.

Jack looked at me before quickly grabbing his walkie-talkie. "ROCKO! What's going-uh on down there? Hm?"

On the other end, I heard a man's shaky voice respond, "It's Batman boss! He's found our hideout!"

_BRUCE! _

The joker's face turned red with anger. "WHAT? HOLD HIM OFF ROCKO! ROUND THE OTHERS! I'M COMING DOWN! ROCKO! DO YOU COPY?"

I heard what sounded like grunting on the other end of the walkie-talkie, and suddenly a dark voice responded that definitely didn't belong to Rocky.

"Surrender Miss Dawes joker!"

"Shit!" I heard Jack mumble before talking into the walkie-talkie again.

"Oooh has the Bat come out to play? Well tell ya what dork knight, I'm kinda in the middle of something with the pretty lady at the moment, so how about we postpone this until later?"

Out of nowhere, I saw Jack produce what looked like a recorder.

He pushed the button, and a woman's scream, followed by pleas to 'stop' and calls for 'help' sounded loudly through the tiny speaker.

"Ooooh she's a feisty one!" Jack giggled while winking at me playfully.

Despite the situation, I rolled my eyes at Jack. He always was a lover of drama and exaggeration.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO HER?" I heard Bruce thunder on the other end.

"Oh…let's just say that-uh…Miss Dawes might be wearin' a permanent smile of her own …if you don't-uh…hm…let me finish my business with her." He giggled again while suddenly rushing over to my side, and pushing me onto the bed.

Before I had time to react, I felt him begin to grope my breasts. As much as I wanted to punch him in the face, I couldn't deny the pleasurable feeling that rose within me at feeling his pale yet warm hands on my chest.

I moaned despite myself.

I heard a growl on the other end of the phone, and realized to my horror, that Bruce had heard it.

"GAME'S OVER CLOWN!" He roared.

"Oh no Batsy…the game's only begun!" He then ended the sentence with his terrifying, high-pitched laughter.

He then threw the device down, and jumped on it repeatedly while giggling like a child.

"Jack…Jack! You can't do this I-"

He suddenly whirled around to face me, and grabbed both my arms. "Can't-uh do, hm…what little Rachel?"

One of his hands slid around my waist, and pressed me firmly against his body, while the other snaked down to my ass.

He began to rub it and squeeze it, and even though I found myself to enjoy it, I still turned red.

"Jack!" I hissed. "Take your hands off of me! This is not the time or the place!"

"Oh but you like it kitten…" He growled in my ear before firmly slapping my ass. I jumped at the feeling before roughly pushing him away from me.

"You can go to Hell Jack!" I spat while backing up into the wall.

"Already there Ray." He replied non-chalantly while smiling sarcastically.

The joker then pulled out a gun and began to stalk towards the door.

I opened my mouth to ask him what he was going to do, but he suddenly whirled around and pointed the gun at me.

His severe glare shut me up before I even had a chance to speak.

"You. stay. right. There. Rachel do you understand? Don't even think about moving from that spot. You're mine! He can't-uh have you! Never again…" He growled dangerously, before slamming the door open, and running out.

As he slammed it closed again, I melted onto the bed, unsure of what to do or think.

Was it bad that I was less than thrilled that Batman had come to my rescue?


End file.
